Are Friends/people a necessity of Life?

Why do we need people or society to live? To be alive? I doubt that! Then why do we need people who are called friends, love, relatives, whatever relationship that we have?

Well, during ancient days people were needed to be in groups as hunting was and is still a group activity. (well, human is not the only social animal in that respect, even other animals have their own groups and are social within that, right?) Later, we needed people around for barter system. However, now, when one earns enough to stand on his or her own legs, then why do we need friends? Or people around?

Why is there such a need and pressure to have friends? I even remember watching a movie, where the bride tells her friends that her fiancé does not have friends and they insist on him having some. They tell her about the problems of not having friends and how that will ruin their marriage! He actually goes out to make friends and the movie continues, the movie is called “I love you, man”. The guy ends up with different type of people as his friends!

Is it the need to share? To show off? Status? Belongingness? What is that thing, which drives people to have someone around? If deprived, to lose their mind?

Is it such a necessity to have friends? Or for that matter people around? To share, to go out, to shop, and what all other reasons! Why? Why cannot a human live alone, without any friends or family support on a day to day basis and be happy about it?

Ok, if you are saying you need someone who cares for you, loves you and who considers you as their world and let you have the same feelings, then I have my set of doubts on that as well! How long can one sustain such feelings? How long one will? And I think life time is a very long time to commit to!

That too when you say it is a selfless act! Some actions are done, purely to make the other person happy and expecting nothing in return! Seriously! Do such people really exist?

Again, if there is no selflessness, then why be social? Why yap so much about it? Does anyone do any act just to make someone else happy? I have my own set of doubts about it! When everything is done with a meaning, selfishness, purpose or expectation then only hurt and pain gets generated right, not love and peace! Then why bother disturbing one’s inner peace by being social?

We have psychologists to share our problems and get useful advice! We have books to read, TV to get entertained, strangers to smile, and unknown people to have a chat! Well, you might say now that I am contradicting my own thoughts! But again, I am talking about strangers and professionals and not friends or relatives! Because, whenever I said people, I meant friends and others who are known! An established relationship!

The one who is alone and happy about it, has the rights to decide how connected or disconnected one wants to be with anyone or anything! Stuff like books, music, and so on don’t hurt! Life will pretty much be on our own terms if this is done! So, why be social? Why rely on people with established relationships? Why trust them? Why?

I seek answers!

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

Becoming Me!

A very peaceful seashore
Completely disturbed me
Trying to concentrate
To attain moksha in solitude

I think the good and the bad
I think about going beyond thinking
I list the positive and the wrong
And I throw the list into the sea

I focus on the sound of waves
The whisper of breeze in my ears
I focus on the blue sky and water
And I try to see what I am!

A tiny creature on this planet
Who existence won’t make a difference
I search to find a purpose
That could bring about some change

I hope to leave a positive mark
Before I walk off forever
I desire to make something worth
I am waiting for my calling to come

I try to find peace and explore myself
To know me and to become me
I need to throw my list of doubts
And find answers to countless questions!

BhaShe!

Young Adults and Old Parents!

I am even unsure if I should be asking these questions! But, because I see homes where kids have flown away to a different home, city, state or country and old parents stay alone, also I see homes where though they stay together, parents are neglected and treated as if they are for kids use or benefit only, I am asking these questions!

It is kids’ responsibility to take care of parents in their old age? Or do parents need to plan for their last days? How wise is it to ask them to plan? (Have money, home, and people to take care of you or an old age home) How wise is it to expect kids to take care of their parents? What is best? Is there a common formula? What about kids who leave their parents and fly off to different home, city, state or countries? Is sending money enough? Is that the only thing that parents look for, from their kids? Or just one month visit in 2 years a good deal? What about daily necessities? What about emotional need of having kids’ around? Should we judge such kids? Who should? On what? And Why?

What we do to our parents is what we should be expecting from your kids? Or what our parents did to their parents is what we should be doing to them? Is there a best set example for this?

If parents ask their kids to curtail their certain dreams and stay grounded, are they considered to be selfish? Or if kids leave their parents in their old age and wander off to pursue their dreams, should they be called selfish? Is there a point where it can be balanced? Where and how?

Looks like my set of questions on this topic will never end and drag to other things, which will become topic for questions again, so I’ll stop here!

Do you have any answers?

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

Just Questions!

Just Questions!

Why? When? How? Which? Where? What? Who? Whom? Whose? We use this very often, get answers sometime and get neglected otherwise. Here is a list of questions which I face, hear, want to answer, seek answers for, have answered, so on and so forth! This section of my blog is called “Just Questions”. If you have answers for any of these questions, please write. If you have more questions, please write them too.

Post 1.

Why do people kill themselves? (Yes, I am still hung over by Jiah Khan’s death and the reasons that she listed in her death note) Is love from a particular person so important that without it one cannot live? Or was delivering a baby that is a love’s child is troublesome. Accepting that life is not taking the turns that you want it to, is so very difficult? Is career the only purpose of life? What happens to the love, affection, upbringing and everything else that parents do? How does all of that become negligible in front of some strangers love and make someone kill herself! Why? Is love really worth dying for? For that matter, is anything really worth dying for? What is? And why?

How do we stop this? How do we tell our younger generation that it is okay! It is okay to lose, to get your heart broken, to suffer loss, and go through pain! How do we tell them and we accept ourselves that it is okay! Believe that moving on with life is the best thing to do. How?

Life, a big question! The purpose of it, is! But feeling purposeless is it enough reason to end life? Or is it enough reason to find one?

Answers Please! :)

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu