Saturday, June 29, 2019

Wounds of Childhood - Part 2

Part 2

http://varthabharati.erelego.com/viewpage.php?edn=Sunday+Magazine&date=2019-06-30&edid=VARTABARTI_SUN&pn=4&fbclid=IwAR1m6ecXBMINDUfrfQ-0OxZDBHW395mnRT_BaBCfh-h8xwKwQxmBn5RzhDQ#Page/4/Article/VARTABARTI_SUN_20190630_4_3/320px/174F41C

Wounds of Childhood - Part 1

I am thrilled to share with you my article published in Varthabharati news paper.

Kimari is a child sexual abuse survivor. Now, a 35-year-old woman, when she looks back at her life, she wonders why she was abused. She knows that nothing she did was/could be the reason for it. She believes her situation made her an easy prey, made her susceptible to abuse. She has narrated her childhood and early adulthood incidents to connect the dots, to find reasons. She thinks along with the abuse; the inability to understand what was going on, the inability to share it and the complicated situation she was in, made it hard for her to deal with it, recover from it and rehabilitate. She believes her struggles are worth if any child in her situation or any parent who thinks like her parents can get benefited by reading her story.

She wishes that her writing reaches as many people as possible.

I have narrated her story in Kannada and it is being published in Varthabharati news paper. Here is a link for all Kannada readers:

http://varthabharati.erelego.com/viewpage.php?edn=Sunday+Magazine&date=2019-06-23&edid=VARTABARTI_SUN&pn=4&fbclid=IwAR24hsKjygoX9Vza1uCKC9PCDBzgc6CNvl0f3AGYBvSWYsVQX0yo6y7JMo4#Page/4/Article/VARTABARTI_SUN_20190623_4_3/320px/16C4ADB

Tuesday, March 5, 2019

Death and Life


Death and Life

“Egg and sperm meet and life is formed”; it is not an accurate statement, because, life is always not formed. Egg and sperm meet and form a cell and it starts to multiply. Only when it forms a beating heart, life is formed. There are times when even though cells multiply, there isn’t a heartbeat. That won’t be called a zygote, it won’t be celebrated; instead it is considered a loss, a lifeless mass, and it is removed from its mother’s uterus. So, is there something else along with egg and sperm that make a baby? If there is, what is that something?

Medical science has made such advances that our expectations have increased. 100 years ago, a preterm baby in breach position with umbilical cord around his neck may not have survived. There is a chance that the mother may not have survived that delivery either. This incident would have been accepted as reality. There would have been a period of mourning, sadness but people would have moved on. The “why” question would have been answered with “God’s will” or “karma” or “fate” or something to that account and mostly that would have been enough. Today, it is not the case.
Today, babies are delivered at 5 months gestation, delivery is postponed, and 500 grams babies are kept alive and taken care off. Today, death can be postponed, can be averted and can be played with.

But even today, death is ultimate, and that reality has not changed. A person, walks into a hospital for a checkup and comes back home in an icebox. A functioning body, with ailing liver and kidneys, gives up beating, breathing and is considered dead. Medical science fails to restore the functionality of these body parts and gives into the pressure of death. Even with oxygen support, lungs fail to take in the needed oxygen. Even with dialysis, toxins are left out in the body. Even on ventilator enough oxygen fails to reach the brain. Even with bold transfusion hemoglobin and platelet count does not stabilize. Medication does not help a failing liver. Efforts put by the medical science fraternity are not considered enough and there are no answers to the question “why”.

I lost someone close to me. He was a father figure to me. He was a loving, caring, kind person, knowledgeable man, a humble human being, a loving father, a friend, and an amazing human being. Whatever he was, everything went away with his death. His sense of humor, intelligence, empathy and wisdom vanished the minute his heart stopped beating. His body was kept in an icebox, it was kept intact, but his beating heart, his active brain, and all that that made him “him”, was gone. Where did it go? I don’t know how to react to devastation like this.

Medical science cannot reverse death. Sometimes, they cannot even postpone it. At times do they advance death, I wonder. He walked into a hospital for check up. He was admitted, was taken care of for 10 days but he passed away. I would have considered that the efforts paid off if he had lived. How do I account for his death? In the game of life and death, effort does not count, right? Did the doctors do all that they could; I wonder if anyone can ever be sure of that.

I wonder what happened when his heart stopped, when his brain went to pre coma stage. The element that makes a heart beat from a mass of cells went away from his body is it? Is that what the spirituals call as “atman”? If yes, where did it go, if no, what happened then?

The question of birth and death has existed forever and it continues to puzzle us. Is there a definitive answer? If there is, what is it?