Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Soul Search

When I was in my +2 classes and 1st year of graduation, this question normally used to hang around in my thoughts, ‘why am I here?’ We all take birth, study, earn and die, but what is the purpose of this whole journey? Why have we been created and what are we supposed to do?

When I got in to 2nd year or so in my graduation, I had found a goal, though temporary, to do MBA. Money, monitory benefits, having a loving partner took over the space I had for these quests.
I was lost in finding my way out, doing higher studies, and in the meanwhile found a loving partner and now, today, I am a happily married lady.

This question of setting a new goal in life kept on coming, the date I joined my job. ‘Joining a good job goal’ was ticked off that day and then I was open for another goal. Marriage became my next priority as I had already found a loving partner. After being married for an year, now am looking to set another goal.

I had been thinking of joining dance classes, or studying law, or M. A. in Kannada or Psychology and all that for a while, but that also would end up being a short term goal. What next is the biggest question I face majority of the times… so what next?

Reading books has been one of my hobbies. While doing my graduation, I have read some books about Sri. Ramakrishna Paramhamsa written by his disciples. I have always been having an attraction towards these kind of books and I have read a few. Those memories are hunting me down now and I am dragged back to those days where my only goal was to find myself. I am strongly haunted by those thoughts now and looking for a way out!

Suddenly a craving has now raised to read ‘Bhagavad Gita’. I am looking for a copy where they have given the Shloka’s and the meaning of it. Not sure where to buy and which one to buy!

Spirituality has been part of my life since childhood. Guess, by the pressure of life, or by the colors of material stuff around me, my interest or craving for spiritual fulfillment had gone covered. Now some serious thinking, which was forced on me, is leading me to think in those terms again and that need is raising again.

I also get a doubt, if am doing some escaping action by taking a refuge under those books and thoughts. Not very sure if am running away, also not very sure from what I have to run away. So hopefully it's not a escaping trick.

Hoping for a safe landing.

BhaShe

9 comments:

Dr.D.T.K.Murthy. said...

Since I am in to spirituality for over a decade I recommend the following list of books;1)words to live by EKNATH EASHWARAN 2)OSHO MEDITATION SERIES(FULL CIRCLE PUBLICATION)-12 booklets.
3)stiiLlness speaks,power of now and a new earth all three books by EKHARDT TOLLE 4)THE LAST LECTURE BY RANDY PAUSCH(if you havent read already)5)THE ART OF MAN MAKING;114 short talks on the BHAGAVAD GEETA BY swamyCHINMAYANANDA-chinmaya mission .they also have holy geeta with explanations by swamy chinmayananda 6)ಮಂಕು ತಿಮ್ಮನ ಕಗ್ಗ -ತಾತ್ಪರ್ಯ ಸಹಿತ by ಶ್ರೀಕಾಂತ್.There are plenty of other good books.if you want more information please let me know.most of the books are available either in swapna bookstall or gangarams.

Badarinath Palavalli said...

Mam

as i believe any book that leads us to think again are equalent to bhagavadh geetha

whenever i felt lost in the path or over dosed by victory; as my ego starts over acting, i prefer to read purnachandra tejaswi, masthi, goruru, chithala, narasimha swamy, adiga and my guru ravi belagere

books have always tells us where we are. after reading bhyarappa's datu, i started to love my village once again.

between me and my wife always narasimha swamy's samsara geethegalu

Badarinath Palavalli said...

2. i am working in kasthuri tv as sr. cameraman. my job always runns under pressure. we have to travell a lot and work so hard. our schedules some time 18 hrs per day, skipps weekly offs, skipps lunch and dinner. some times i can heardly smoke

still our office never appreciats us or awards us by a hike in salary

to over come these sad images, i read books and gopala krishna adiga's "amrutha vahiniyondu" poem inspirs me

u r settled women with achieved goals. u must be proud upon ur loving parents & husb

Sarvesh said...

I see you heading towards Art of Living...Lol...what a lame comment after the serious ones on top...heehee...:-)Let me know when you join the course...All the best...;-)

kanasu said...

As i said, this needs an elaborated discussion wid u...so am not gonna talk anything abt it here :)
...well all the best gal!

The Inner Side of "ME" said...

Kind of similar thought used to come in my mind years back. Now I have stopped thinking about these things. Don't know its good or bad but I just keep looking for new goals and enjoy whatever comes.

ಸಾಗರದಾಚೆಯ ಇಂಚರ said...

Time changes, mind changes
goal changes
finally human changes
thats the way of life

ಸುಧೇಶ್ ಶೆಟ್ಟಿ said...

You have nicely written the journey of your life :) I think everyone will have some sort of quests in different stages of his life....

ಸುಧೇಶ್ ಶೆಟ್ಟಿ said...

You have nicely written the journey of your life... I think everyone has some sort of these quests in different stages of his life...