Death and Life

Death and Life

“Egg and sperm meet and life is formed”; it is not an accurate statement, because, life is always not formed. Egg and sperm meet and form a cell and it starts to multiply. Only when it forms a beating heart, life is formed. There are times when even though cells multiply, there isn’t a heartbeat. That won’t be called a zygote, it won’t be celebrated; instead it is considered a loss, a lifeless mass, and it is removed from its mother’s uterus. So, is there something else along with egg and sperm that make a baby? If there is, what is that something?

Medical science has made such advances that our expectations have increased. 100 years ago, a preterm baby in breach position with umbilical cord around his neck may not have survived. There is a chance that the mother may not have survived that delivery either. This incident would have been accepted as reality. There would have been a period of mourning, sadness but people would have moved on. The “why” question would have been answered with “God’s will” or “karma” or “fate” or something to that account and mostly that would have been enough. Today, it is not the case.
Today, babies are delivered at 5 months gestation, delivery is postponed, and 500 grams babies are kept alive and taken care off. Today, death can be postponed, can be averted and can be played with.

But even today, death is ultimate, and that reality has not changed. A person, walks into a hospital for a checkup and comes back home in an icebox. A functioning body, with ailing liver and kidneys, gives up beating, breathing and is considered dead. Medical science fails to restore the functionality of these body parts and gives into the pressure of death. Even with oxygen support, lungs fail to take in the needed oxygen. Even with dialysis, toxins are left out in the body. Even on ventilator enough oxygen fails to reach the brain. Even with bold transfusion hemoglobin and platelet count does not stabilize. Medication does not help a failing liver. Efforts put by the medical science fraternity are not considered enough and there are no answers to the question “why”.

I lost someone close to me. He was a father figure to me. He was a loving, caring, kind person, knowledgeable man, a humble human being, a loving father, a friend, and an amazing human being. Whatever he was, everything went away with his death. His sense of humor, intelligence, empathy and wisdom vanished the minute his heart stopped beating. His body was kept in an icebox, it was kept intact, but his beating heart, his active brain, and all that that made him “him”, was gone. Where did it go? I don’t know how to react to devastation like this.

Medical science cannot reverse death. Sometimes, they cannot even postpone it. At times do they advance death, I wonder. He walked into a hospital for check up. He was admitted, was taken care of for 10 days but he passed away. I would have considered that the efforts paid off if he had lived. How do I account for his death? In the game of life and death, effort does not count, right? Did the doctors do all that they could; I wonder if anyone can ever be sure of that.

I wonder what happened when his heart stopped, when his brain went to pre coma stage. The element that makes a heart beat from a mass of cells went away from his body is it? Is that what the spirituals call as “atman”? If yes, where did it go, if no, what happened then?

The question of birth and death has existed forever and it continues to puzzle us. Is there a definitive answer? If there is, what is it?

ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಮನುಷ್ಯಳಲ್ಲ - Women are not humans

ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಮನುಷ್ಯಳಲ್ಲ
ಯೋನಿಯೊಂದಿಗೆ ಹುಟ್ಟಿದ ಒಂದೇ ಕಾರಣಕ್ಕೆ
ಬದುಕು ಪಂಜರವಾಗಿ
ಅತ್ಯಾಚಾರವೇ ಹಾಡಾಗಿ
ದಿನಾ ಸಾಯುವ ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಮನುಷ್ಯಳಲ್ಲ

ಮನೆಯ ಗೌರವ, ಜಾತಿಯ ಗೌರವ
ಹೆಚ್ಚಾದರೆ ಹಳ್ಳಿ, ತಾಲ್ಲೂಕು, ಜಿಲ್ಲೆಯದ್ದೂ
ಎಲ್ಲ ಗೌರವವ ಅವಳ ಯೋನಿಯಲಿಟ್ಟು
ಹೆದರುತ್ತಲೇ ಓಡಾಡಬೇಕಾಗಿರುವ
ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಮನುಷ್ಯಳಲ್ಲ

ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಪ್ರ‍ಾಣಿಯೂ ಅಲ್ಲ
ಕುರಿ, ಕೋಳಿ ಕಡಿಯುವಾಗ
ಅದರ ಲಿಂಗ ನೋಡುವುದಿಲ್ಲ
ಯೋನಿಗೆ ಕಬ್ಬಿಣ ತುರುಕುವುದಿಲ್ಲ
ದಿನಗಟ್ಟಲೆ ಬಂಧಿಸಿ ಅತ್ಯಾಚಾರ ಮಾಡುವುದಿಲ್ಲ
ಹಸುವಿನ ಮಾತಂತೂ ಬಿಟ್ಟೇಬಿಡಿ
ಕೊಂದರೆ ಸಾವು ಕಾದಿದ್ದೇ
ಕೆಲವೊಮ್ಮೆ, ಕೊಲ್ಲದಿದ್ದರೂ
"ಗೋ ರಕ್ಷಣೆ"ಯಿದೆ, ಸ್ತ್ರೀಗಿಲ್ಲ
ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಮನುಷ್ಯಳಲ್ಲ

ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಮರ, ಗಿಡವೂ ಅಲ್ಲ
ಕಾಡು ಕಡಿದರೆ ಜೈಲು
ಲಿಂಗ ತಾರತಮ್ಯವಿಲ್ಲ
ಗ್ಲೊಬಲ್ ವಾರ್ಮಿಂಗ್
ಎಲ್ಲರಿಗೂ ಗೊತ್ತಿರುವ ಸತ್ಯ
ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಮನುಷ್ಯಳಲ್ಲ
ಪ್ರಾಣಿಯೂ, ಮರ ಗಿಡವೂ ಅಲ್ಲ

ಗಂಡಿನ ಶಿಶ್ನಕ್ಕೆ ಹೆದರುತ್ತಾ
ಯೋನಿಯ ಇರುವಿಕೆಗೆ ಬೆದರುತ್ತಾ
ಹುಟ್ಟಿನಿಂದ ಸಾಯುವವರೆಗೆ
ತನ್ನ ಇರುವನ್ನೇ ಮುಚ್ಚಿಟ್ಟು ಬದುಕುತ್ತಾ
ಸುಲಭಕ್ಕೆ "ಮರ್ಯಾದೆ" ತೆಗೆಯಬಹುದಾದ
ಸುಲಭಕ್ಕೆ ಸಾಯಬಹುದಾದ
ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಮನುಷ್ಯಳಲ್ಲ

ಅವಳು ವಸ್ತುವಾ? ಆಯುಧವಾ? ಅಥವಾ ಏನೂ ಅಲ್ಲವಾ?

ಹೆಣ್ಣನ್ನು ಈ ಮಟ್ಟಕ್ಕೆ ಇಳಿಸಿರುವ
ಮತ್ತೆಲ್ಲರೂ, ಈ ಸಮಾಜಕೂಡ
ಮನುಷ್ಯರದಲ್ಲ
ಅದ್ಯಾರದ್ದೋ, ನನಗೆ ಗೊತ್ತಿಲ್ಲ

ಭಾಶೇ

Women, not human
Cursed with a vagina
Life is prison
Abuse, our song
Crushed everyday to death
Women are not humans

Respect of the family, caste,
At times, village, taluk, districts too
Is hidden in our vaginas
We walk with fear
Women are not humans

Women are not animals either
Before you butcher a chicken or goat
Gender is not looked at
No iron rod is inserted into the vagina
Neither are they raped everyday
Forget about cows
Death is imminent if you kill one
At times even if you don’t
Cows are protected, women are not
Women are not humans

Women are not plants and trees either
Permits and jail, process involved
No gender to look at
Global warming
Inevitable truth
Women are not humans
Not animals, not plants or trees

Terrified of a man’s penis
Terrified of having a vagina
Hiding her existence
From birth to death
Loses “respect” easily
Loses life easily
Women are not humans

Is she an object? A weapon? Or “nothing”?

The society and everyone else who
Have brought women to this level
Are also not humans
I don’t know what they are!

BhaShe

I want to fix my country for the next generation

There was a time when I was in my own bubble and did not care about the world. I did my work, got paid, paid my taxes and that is all that mattered. I had money in my account and I was happy.
Today, I am a freelancer, taking a break, not working full time or earning like I used to, but I am aware of some of what is happening around me and I am bothered. I am frustrated, angry and concerned. And I do not want to keep quiet about it.

There was a time when our politicians looted our country. They have taken away crores and crores of tax payers’ money and we have done nothing about it. Black money, white money, foreign currency, gold, in many forms they have stored all our resources away in their lockers and we have done nothing about it. Scandal after scandal we Indians and the country has been looted and we have done nothing about it.

Now, it looks like the time for corporate giants to do so. Vijay Mallya, Nirav Modi, - I don’t know how big this list will go - are looting our country, our banks. Though, I do not have a clear understanding of how tax payers will be affected by this loot, I don’t find anyone else but tax payers who have to bear the burden.
Why is this happening in my country, why? And why are we keeping quiet about it? And more importantly do we know what we can do and what we should do? How do we work towards fixing this? How to get the money back and restoring some form of justice? I don’t know. This is one side to the problem.

The other side is, not letting such cases happen in the future. How do we do that? The other day, in a conversation with my father in law, he mentioned something about the loss of sense of pride. I understand it better today, looking at the number of people who have sold their souls for money. If we were to have a culture of pride in self, maybe we could turn out to be incorruptible?

This brings me to my idea of a sense of equality. Whether I am rich or not, educated or not, well to do or not, employed or not, if I have a sense of equality that I do not consider myself above or below anyone for whatever they may or may not have, then too, I can be incorruptible, right?

I believe in the idea of making money, creating jobs, growing economy and all that along with saving the environment and not exploiting any form of resources. I believe in working hard and not copying, growing and not pulling someone down, and being hopeful and not a cynic. I believe in the idea of having a sense of equality and the desire to work my way up the ladder the right way. Having a sense of pride whether I go up or not, whether I achieve what I aimed for or not. I believe in the idea of having a sense of contentment, using the term “enough” in life and applying it more often than not. I believe in having a sense of purpose that is bigger than self and bigger than my personal gain. I believe in feeling part of community and therefore having an identity that is not just me. I believe these could lead to a generation of solid and incorruptible souls.

I want to fix my country today, right now! I feel the need, I feel the urgency and I feel the desire. I want to leave a better society for the coming generations. I want the next generation to inherit a just, caring and trust worthy society which looks after everyone. I want to leave behind a society, a world with no corruption, no hate and no bitterness. I hope for a society with a sense of hope, trust, a sense of community with full of souls who are incorruptible.

Am I dreaming for something impossible? Please say “no”. I want to believe this is possible and I can work towards making this happen.

A concerned citizen.

ಪರ್ವತದಲ್ಲಿ ಪವಾಡ - ಪುಸ್ತಕ ವಿಮರ್ಶೆ

ಸಂಯುಕ್ತಾ ಪುಲಿಗಲ್ ರ ಪರ್ವತದಲ್ಲಿ ಪವಾಡ ಓದಿ ಕೆಳಗಿಟ್ಟಿದ್ದೇನೆ. ನೆನ್ನೆಗೆ ಮುಗಿಯಿತು. ಇಂದು ಏನೋ ಖಾಲಿತನ. ಎರೆಡು ದಿನ ಎಡೆಬಿಡದೆ, ಬಿಡುವಾದಾಗಲೆಲ್ಲಾ ಓದಿದರ ಪರಿಣಾಮ.

ಆಂಡೀಸ್ ಶ್ರ‍ೇಣಿಯ ಮೌನಕ್ಕೆ ಮನಸ್ಸು ಹಾತೊರೆಯುತ್ತಿದೆ. ಅವರು ಬದುಕಿರದಿದ್ದಲ್ಲಿ ಈ ಪುಸ್ತಕ ಬರೆಯುತ್ತಿರಲಿಲ್ಲ, ಹಾಗಾಗಿ, ನ್ಯಾಂಡೋ ಬದುಕಿದರು ಎಂದು ಗೊತ್ತಿದ್ದರೂ, ಹೇಗೆ ಎಂದರಿಯುವ ಕುತೂಹಲದಿ ಬಿಟ್ಟೂ ಬಿಡದೆ ಓದಿಸಿದ ಪುಸ್ತಕ ಈಗ ಕೈಬಿಟ್ಟು ಮೇಜು ಸೇರಿದೆ. ಮನಸು ಖಾಲಿ ಖಾಲಿ.

ತಾನು ಓದಲು ಶುರು ಮಾಡಿದಾಗ ಕೈಬಿಡಲಾಗಲಿಲ್ಲ ಎಂದಳು ಸಂ. ಪು. ಹಾಗೇ ಭಟ್ಟಿ ಇಳಿಸಿದ್ದಾಳೆ ಕನ್ನಡಕ್ಕೆ. ಅದು ಹೇಗೆ ಅನುವಾದಿಸಿದಳೂ, ಗೊತ್ತಿಲ್ಲ!

ಪುಸ್ತಕ ಗಟ್ಟಿ ಹಿಡಿತ ಹೊಂದಿದೆ. ಕಡೆಯವರೆಗೂ ಒಂದೂ ಶಬ್ದವನ್ನು, ಅನುಚಿತವಾಗಿ, ಅನಾವಶ್ಯಕವಾಗಿ ಬರೆಯಲಾಗಿಲ್ಲ. ಗಟ್ಟಿಯಾದ ಕಥೆ, ಬೇಸರಕ್ಕೆ ಆಸ್ಪದ ಕೊಡದೆ ಓದಿಸಿಕೊಂಡು ಹೋಗುತ್ತದೆ.

ಅನುವಾದ, ಒಂದು ಭಾಷೆಗೆ ಹೊಚ್ಚ ಹೊಸ ಯೋಚನೆಗಳನ್ನು ತರುವ ಸಾಧನ. ನಮ್ಮಲ್ಲಿ ಯಾರದರೂ ಆಂಡೀಸ್ ಪರ್ವತಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಕಳೆದು ಹೋಗುವ ಸಾಧ್ಯತೆ, ಬಹಳ ಕಡಿಮೆ. ಹಾಗಂತ ಆ ಅನುಭವವನ್ನು ನಮ್ಮ ಭಾಷೆಯಲ್ಲಿ ಓದಲಾಗದು/ಓದಬಾರದು ಎಂತೇನೂ ಇಲ್ಲವಲ್ಲ?

ಅನುವಾದ ಹಾಗೆಯೇ, ಬರೆಯುವ ವಿಧಾನ, ಭಾಷೆಯ ಬಳಕೆ, ಉಪಯೋಗಕ್ಕೂ ನವೀನತೆಯನ್ನು ತರುತ್ತದೆ. ಭಾವನೆಗಳ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಬರೆಯುವ, ಭಾವನೆಗಳನ್ನು ಬಳಸುವ ರೀತಿ ಭಾಷ್ಯಾನುಸಾರ ಬದಲಾಗುತ್ತದೆ. ಅನುವಾದ, ಈ ಹೊಸ ರೀತಿಗಳನ್ನು ಅರಿಯಲು ಸಹಾಯ ಮಾಡುತ್ತದೆ.

ಕನ್ನಡಕ್ಕೆ ಬಂದಿರುವ ನ್ಯಾಂಡೋರವರ ಪುಸ್ತಕ ಅವರ ಸಾಹಸ, ಬದುಕು ಸಾವಿನ ನಡುವಿನ ಹೋರಾಟ ಮತ್ತು ಛಲವನ್ನಷ್ಟೇ ಅಲ್ಲದೆ, ಅವರ ಭಾವನೆಗಳ ಹರಿವು, ಭಾಷೆಯನ್ನು ಬಳಸುವ ವಿಧಾನ, ಮತ್ತು ಯೋಚನಾಲಹರಿಯನ್ನೂ ಅರಿಯಲು ಸಹಾಯ ಮಾಡುತ್ತದೆ. ಅನುವಾದದ ಉದ್ದೇಶವನ್ನು ಅನುವಾದಕರ ದೃಷ್ಟಿ ಮಾತ್ರ ನಿರ್ಧರಿಸಲು ಸಾಧ್ಯ. ಓದುಗರಿಗೆ ಆ ಸವಿಯನ್ನು ಸವಿಯಲು ಮಾತ್ರ ಅವಕಾಶ.

ಉತ್ತಮ ಪುಸ್ತಕವನ್ನು ಕನ್ನಡಕ್ಕೆ ತಂದಿದ್ದಕ್ಕೆ, ಗೆಳತಿ ಸಂಯುಕ್ತಾಳಿಗೆ ಅಭಿನಂದನೆಗಳು ಮತ್ತು ಧನ್ಯವಾದಗಳು.

ಭಾಶೆ

Where are we headed?

Today, I read in the news papers, a bus conductor was physically abused for stopping a boy from harassing a girl in the bus. A thoughtful, noble act rewarded with abuse, hurt and thrashing? Why? Why do our youngsters think it is okay to hurt someone? What have we done wrong? Where have we gone wrong in their upbringing?

Abuse of freedom of speech – “whatever you say is valued” is this the impression created by parents/society today. Is this over importance encouraging the kids to abuse?

You deserve everything – whether it is an expensive mobile phone or a girl who is not interested in you. The mentality of 'deserving', is that the problem?

Whatever you do, I will save you – parents taking responsibility for their children's action and saving them. Is that the problem?

Shortsightedness – this instant gratification generation is looking for only that, instant gratification. In such a case, who thinks about consequences?

Societal apathy – our general attitude of “it is none of my business” leading to creation unsafe spaces?

No sense of right or wrong – Have ideas like right and wrong gone missing? Are we in a time and space where over extension of the being nonjudgmental philosophy leading to this loss?

I am worried reading this. I wonder what we can do to change this. How can we look at today’s youth and help them have a healthy attitude. How???

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

Penance

I deserve
So, you forgive

It slipped my hand
I broke your heart
I now understand
What I’ve hurt
I see my deeds
My heart is shrunk
I beg, I plead
Wash my stink

I know, I know, I know
The pain is hard to let go
But please know, know, know
I won’t ever let you go
I love you, love you, love you
From the bottom of my heart
No matter what you do
Our life wont tear apart
I will wait and wait and wait
For you to take me as I am
It’s in my fate and my fate
I know that day isn’t far

My mistake
Being careless
That doesn’t make
Me reckless
I was wrong
I acknowledge
Pain was long
But now I pledge

I know, I know, I know
The pain is hard to let go
But please know, know, know
I won’t ever let you go
I love you, love you, love you
From the bottom of my heart
No matter what you do
Our life wont tear apart
I will wait and wait and wait
For you to take me as I am
It’s in my fate and my fate
I know that day isn’t far

I will be careful
Won’t cause hurt
More thankful
Forget the dirt
Don’t I deserve
One more chance
So you forgive
My time to penance

BhaShe

ಮುಗಿಯದ ಮಾತು

ಭೇಟಿ, ಒಳತೋಟಿ ತೆರೆದು
ಗುಡ್ಡೆ ಹಾಕಿದ್ದ ನೆನಪುಗಳ ಹರಡಿ
ಎಷ್ಟು ಹೇಳಿದರೂ ಮುಗಿಯದೆ
ಮುಂದಿನ ಭೇಟಿಗಷ್ಟು ಉಳಿಸಿ
ಮಾತುಗಳು ಮುಗಿಯುತ್ತಿದ್ದವು

ತೀರ ಅನಿವಾರ್ಯವಾದರೊಂದು ದೂರವಾಣಿ ಕರೆ
ಅಷ್ಟು ಮಾತು, ಮತ್ತೆ ತೆರೆ
ಹೇಳದೆ ಉಳಿದ ಮಾತುಗಳಿದ್ದವು
ಅದಕಷ್ಟು ಬೆಲೆಯಿತ್ತು
ಮಾತು ಉಳಿದರೂ ಮಾತು ಮುಗಿಯುತ್ತಿತ್ತು

ಚಾಟ್ ರೂಮಿನ ಬಾಗಿಲ ಹಿಂದೆ
ಬೇರೆಯದೇ ವಿಶ್ವ ತೆರೆದರೂ
ಅದಕೂ ಇತಿ ಮಿತಿ ಇತ್ತು
ಬಾಗಿಲಾಚೆ ಬೇರೆ ಲೋಕವಿತ್ತು
ಮಾತುಗಳು ಮುಗಿಯುತ್ತಿದ್ದವು

ಅಂತರ್ಜಾಲ ಕೈಯಲ್ಲಿ ಹಿಡಿದು
ಸಮಯ, ದೂರಗಳ ಎಲ್ಲೆ ಮೀರಿ
ಬೇಕು ಬೇಡದವರೆಲ್ಲಾ ಬದುಕಿಗಿಣಕುವಾಗ
ಸಂಬಂದಗಳ ಗೆರೆ ಮಸುಕಾದಾಗ
ಮಾತುಗಳು ಮುಗಿಯುವುದಿಲ್ಲ

ಇಂದು ಮಾತುಗಳು ಮುಗಿಯುವುದಿಲ್ಲ
ಎರೆಡರ ಮಧ್ಯರಾತ್ರಿಯಲಿ ಗಿಣಿಗುಟ್ಟುವ ಫೋನು
ವಾಟ್ಸಾಪು, ಫೇಸ್ಬುಕ್ಕಿನಲಿ ಬರುವ ಮಾತು
ದಿನ, ವಾರ, ವರ್ಷಗಟ್ಟಲೆ ಆಡಿದರೂ
ಇಂದು ಮಾತುಗಳು ಮುಗಿಯುವುದಿಲ್ಲ

ಭಾಶೇ

Unasked Apology

He didn’t apologize
I HAVE to forgive

Walked on my broken heart
Did it pierce his feet?
Shattering sounds of my dreams
Broke his ear drums?

I know my suffering
He moved on without trying?
Something inside still hurts
Is he married, does he flirts?

Does he know my feelings?
Am I still a weakling?
Pull myself together
Realize, he doesn’t bother!

He won’t ever say sorry
And why is that my worry?
Whom and what to forgive!
Will my efforts ever be effective?

BhaShe

Tr(i)ump(h)

“Build a wall”, he said
I tried
To save my heart from thunder and storms
To hide the source of light in my eyes from getting robbed
To revive the fountain of my feelings, not let it run dry
To lick my wounds in safety
I tried to build a wall

“Lock her up”, he said
I tried
Locking her up in a corner of my mind, my heart
So I know she is there
To figure
So I can know what is happening
To plan
“Keep your friends close, enemies closer”,

“Drain the swamp” he said
I tried
I brush, wash my mouth and scrub my tongue
I write to rid myself off the bitter taste
I pack suitcases of memories
Call them “luggage”
Try and throw at these dump yards:
Therapy, counselor, paint, clay, talk, hypnotize, dance
Drain the swamp in my mind

BhaShe

Disclaimer:
I don’t support the man who said these
I just picked the lines
Stitched it to my poem

Looking through the wrong side

Looking through the wrong side

I acquired binoculars
To sort my issues
It wasn’t helpful
I looked through the wrong side

Problems were bigger
Solutions farther
Caused damage to hope
Distress and pain

I put them down
Took a break
Walked around
Gave a thorough look

Picked it again
The right way
When I looked through
Oh! What a view!

Smaller problems
Closer solutions
Life seemed easy
When my view is right

BhaShe

To be there

When I offer to share
But you are not there
Then the moment is gone

Then my story was new
But pink turned to blue
Feelings can’t be undone

Its choices we make
Split second it takes
Leads to pain or fun

But the choices we make
A life long it takes
To know what’s to be done

I open my heart
Wanna give you a part
My way to connect

If you keep it at bay
And ask me to stay
It has its effect

When I call out for you
Tell you I need you
It’s a moment of truth

If you don’t want to be
Then tell me so please
I can’t take your ruth

I want to share
Coz I think you care
Isn’t it true?

If I have to wait
And that’s your trait
Then it’s not cool!

When I offer to share
But you are not there
Then the moment is gone

When I offer to share
But you are not there
Then the moment is gone

BhsShe

Centre for Community Dialogue and Change brings to India Workshops in Theatre for Living by David Diamond

(Scroll down for English Version)

ಸೆಂಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಕಮ್ಯುನಿಟಿ ಡೈಲಾಗ್ ಅಂಡ್ ಚೇಂಜ್ (CCDC)
ಎ 6, ಗ್ರಾಸ್ಮಿಯರ್ ಅಪಾರ್ಟ್ಮೆಂಟ್ಸ್,
ಒಸ್ಬೊರ್ನ್ ರೋಡ್, ಬೆಂಗಳೂರು
ದೂರವಾಣಿ: 080 23692168 
contact@ccdc.in 

ಸೆಂಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಕಮ್ಯುನಿಟಿ ಡೈಲಾಗ್ ಅಂಡ್ ಚೇಂಜ್ ಭಾರತದಲ್ಲಿ ಮೊದಲಬಾರಿಗೆ ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಡೈಮಂಡರ "ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಲಿವಿಂಗ್" ಕಾರ್ಯಾಗಾರವನ್ನು ಆಯೋಜಿಸಿದೆ.

ಸೆಂಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಕಮ್ಯುನಿಟಿ ಡೈಲಾಗ್ ಅಂಡ್ ಚೇಂಜ್ ಈ ಹೊಸವರ್ಷವನ್ನು ಅಂತಾರಾಷ್ಟ್ರೀಯ ಪ್ರಶಂಸೆಗೆ ಒಳಗಾಗಿರುವ ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಡೈಮಂಡ್ ಮತ್ತು ಅವರ ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಲಿವಿಂಗ್ ಅನ್ನು ಬೆಂಗಳೂರಿಗೆ ತರುವ ಮೂಲಕ ಆಚರಿಸುತ್ತಿದೆ. 2014ರಲ್ಲಿ ಅತ್ಯಂತ ಯಶಸ್ವಿಯಾಗಿ ರಾಷ್ಟ್ರೀಯ ಮಟ್ಟದಲ್ಲಿ "ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಆಫ್ ದಿ ಒಪ್ಪ್ರೆಸ್ಡ್" (TO) ಸಮ್ಮೇಳನ "ಡೈವರ್ಸಿಟಿ ಡೈಲಾಗ್" ಆಯೋಜಿಸಿದ ನಂತರ, CCDC, ಜನವರಿ 2 ರಿಂದ ಜನವರಿ 17, 2017 ರ ವರೆಗೆ ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಡೈಮಂಡರ ಮೂರು ಕಾರ್ಯಾಗಾರಗಳನ್ನು ಎದುರುನೋಡುತ್ತಿದೆ.

ಸೆಂಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಕಮ್ಯುನಿಟಿ ಡೈಲಾಗ್ ಅಂಡ್ ಚೇಂಜ್
CCDC ಬೆಂಗಳೂರಿನಲ್ಲಿ ಸ್ಥಾಪಿತವಾದ ಸಂಸ್ಥೆಯಾಗಿದ್ದು ಅದು "ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಆಫ್ ದಿ ಒಪ್ಪ್ರೆಸ್ಡ್" ಅನ್ನು ಪ್ರಚಾರಗೊಳಿಸುತ್ತಿದೆ. ವೈಯಕ್ತಿಕ ಮತ್ತು ಸಾಮಾಜಿಕ ಬದಲಾವಣೆಗಾಗಿ ಒಂದು ಸೃಜನಾತ್ಮಕ ಸಾಧನವಾಗಿ ಪ್ರಪಂಚದಾದ್ಯಂತ ಬಳಸಲಾಗುತ್ತಿರುವ "ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಆಫ್ ದಿ ಒಪ್ಪ್ರೆಸ್ಡ್", ಬ್ರೆಜಿಲಿಯನ್ ರಂಗಭೂಮಿ ನಿರ್ದೇಶಕ ಆಗಸ್ಟೊ ಬೊಆಲ್ ರವರಿಂದ ರಚಿಸಲ್ಪಟ್ಟಿದೆ. ಪೌಲೊ ಪ್ರೈಯರಿಯವರ "ಪೆಡಗೊಜಿ ಆಫ್ ದಿ ಒಪ್ಪ್ರೆಸ್ಡ್" ಪುಸ್ತಕದಲ್ಲಿರುವ ಕಲ್ಪನೆಗಳಿಂದ ಪ್ರೇರೇಪಿತಗೊಂಡ ರಂಗಭೂಮಿಯ ಆಟಗಳು ಮತ್ತು ಚಟುವಟಿಕೆಗಳ ಗುಂಪು ಇದಾಗಿದೆ. TO ಕಾರ್ಯಾಗಾರಗಳು ವ್ಯಕ್ತಿಗಳು ಮತ್ತು ಸಮುದಾಯಗಳು ತಮ್ಮನ್ನು ಮತ್ತು ಇತರರನ್ನು ರೂಪಾಂತರಗೊಳಿಸಲು ತಮ್ಮಲ್ಲಿ ಇರುವ ಸಾಮರ್ಥ್ಯವನ್ನು ಕಂಡುಕೊಳ್ಳಲು ಒಟ್ಟಿಗೆ ಬರಲು ಸಾಧ್ಯವಾಗುವ ಜಾಗವನ್ನು ಸೃಷ್ಟಿಸುತ್ತದೆ.

ನೀವು www.ccdc.in. ನಲ್ಲಿ CCDC ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಓದಬಹುದು.

ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಡೈಮಂಡ್ ಮತ್ತು ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಲಿವಿಂಗ್

ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಡೈಮಂಡ್, ವ್ಯಾಂಕುವಾರ್ ನ ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಲಿವಿಂಗ್ (TfL) (ಹಿಂದೆ ಹೆಡ್ಲೈನ್ಸ್ ಥಿಯೇಟರ್), ನ ಸಂಸ್ಥಾಪಕ ಮತ್ತು ಕಲಾತ್ಮಕ ನಿರ್ದೇಶಕರಾಗಿದ್ದಾರೆ. ರಂಗಭೂಮಿಯನ್ನು ಬಳಸಿಕೊಂಡು ಸಮುದಾಯಗಳು ತಮ್ಮ ಕಥೆಗಳನ್ನು ಹೇಳಲು ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಲಿವಿಂಗ್ (TfL) ಸಹಾಯಮಾಡುತ್ತದೆ. TfL ಆಗಸ್ಟೊ ಬೊಆಲ್ ರ ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಆಫ್ ದಿ ಒಪ್ಪ್ರೆಸ್ಡ್ ಇಂದ ವಿಕಾಸಗೊಂಡಿದೆ. "ಪೀಡಕ / ತುಳಿತಕ್ಕೊಳಗಾದವರು" ಎಂಬ ಬೈನರಿ / ದ್ವಿಮುಖ ಭಾಷೆಯಿಂದ ದೂರಹೋಗಿ ಇದು ಕಲಾತ್ಮಕ ಅಭಿವ್ಯಕ್ತಿಗಳಿಗೆ ತಡೆ ಹಾಕಿದಾಗ ಉಂಟಾಗುವ ಸಾಮಾಜಿಕ ಅನಾರೋಗ್ಯವನ್ನು ನಿವಾರಿಸಲು ಅವಕಾಶ ಒದಗಿಸುತ್ತದೆ.

ನಾವು ನಮ್ಮ ದೈನಂದಿನ ಶಬ್ದಕೋಶವನ್ನು ಸಾಂಸ್ಕೃತಿಕ ಅಭಿವ್ಯಕ್ತಿಯ ಭಾಗವಾಗಿ ಪುನಃ ಬಳಸಲಾರಂಬಿಸಿದರೆ - ನಾವು ನಮ್ಮ ಸಾಮೂಹಿಕ ಕಥೆಗಳು ಹೇಳಲು ಬಳಸುವ ಒಂದು ಸಾಮಾನ್ಯ ಭಾಷೆ - ನಾವು ವೈಯಕ್ತಿಕ ಮತ್ತು ಸಾಮಾಜಿಕ ಸಮತೋಲನದತ್ತ ಮುಂದುವರೆದಂತೆ.

ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಮೂಲನಿವಾಸಿಗಳು, ನಿರಾಶ್ರಿತರು, ಮಹಿಳಾ ಗುಂಪುಗಳು, ಪರಿಸರವಾದಿಗಳು, ರಸ್ತೆಯ ಯುವಜನ, ಆರೋಗ್ಯ ವೃತ್ತಿಗಾರರು ಮತ್ತು ನಿರಾಶ್ರಿತರು ಸೇರಿದಂತೆ ವಿಶ್ವದಾದ್ಯಂತ ಹಲವಾರು ಗುಂಪುಗಳ ಜೊತೆ ಕೆಲಸ ಮಾಡಿದ್ದಾರೆ.
ಅವರು ಕೆನಡಾ, USA ಮತ್ತು ಯುರೋಪ್, ನಮೀಬಿಯಾ, ನ್ಯೂಜಿಲ್ಯಾಂಡ್, ಆಸ್ಟ್ರೇಲಿಯಾ, ಬ್ರೆಜಿಲ್, ರುವಾಂಡಾ, ಪ್ಯಾಲೆಸ್ಟೈನ್ ಮತ್ತು ಸಿಂಗಾಪುರಗಳ ಉದ್ದಕ್ಕೂ ಕೆಲಸ ಮಾಡಿದ್ದಾರೆ, ಮತ್ತು ನೇರ, ಪರಸ್ಪರ ವೇದಿಕೆ, ದೂರದರ್ಶನ ಮತ್ತು ವೆಬ್ ಪ್ರಸಾರದ ಅಭಿವೃದ್ಧಿ ಪಡಿಸಿದ್ದಾರೆ.

ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಸಿಟಿ ವ್ಯಾಂಕೋವರ್ ಸಾಂಸ್ಕೃತಿಕ ಹಾರ್ಮನಿ ಪ್ರಶಸ್ತಿ, ಜೆಸ್ಸಿ ರಿಚರ್ಡ್ಸನ್ ರವರ ಇನ್ನೊವೇಷನ್ ಇನ್ ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಪ್ರಶಸ್ತಿ, ಫ಼್ರೇಸರ್ ವ್ಯಾಲಿ ವಿಶ್ವವಿದ್ಯಾಲಯದಿಂದ ಗೌರವ ಡಾಕ್ಟರೇಟ್, ಮತ್ತು ರಾಜಕೀಯ ರಂಗಕಲೆಗೆ ಒಟ್ಟೊ ರೆನೆ ಕ್ಯಾಸ್ಟಿಲ್ಲೊ ಪ್ರಶಸ್ತಿ ಸೇರಿದಂತೆ ಹಲವಾರು ಪ್ರಶಸ್ತಿಗಳನ್ನು ಸ್ವೀಕರಿಸಿದ್ದಾರೆ.

ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಆಸ್ಟ್ರಿಯಾದ ಯೂನಿವರ್ಸಿಟಿ ಆಫ್ ಇನ್ಸ್ಬ್ರಕ್ ನಲ್ಲಿ ಯುನೆಸ್ಕೋ ದ ಶಾಂತಿ ಅಧ್ಯಯನಗಳ ಸ್ನಾತಕೋತ್ತರ ಕಲಾ ವಿಭಾಗದಲ್ಲಿ ಶಾಂತಿ, ಅಭಿವೃದ್ಧಿ, ಭದ್ರತೆ ಮತ್ತು ಅಂತರರಾಷ್ಟ್ರೀಯ ಕಾನ್ಫ್ಲಿಕ್ಟ್ ಟ್ರ್ಯಾನ್ಸ್ಫರ್ಮೇಷನ್ ಭೋದಿಸುವ ಅತಿಥಿ ಪ್ರಾಧ್ಯಾಪಕರಾಗಿದ್ದಾರೆ. ಹಾಗೆಯೇ ಆಲ್ಬರ್ಟಾ ವಿಶ್ವವಿದ್ಯಾನಿಲಯದಲ್ಲಿ ಮೆಡಿಸಿನ್ ಮತ್ತು ಡೆಂಟಿಸ್ಟ್ರಿ ಯ ವಿಭಾಗದಲ್ಲಿ ಕೂಡ ಅಥಿತಿ ರಂಗನಿರ್ದೇಶಕರಾಗಿದ್ದಾರೆ.

TfL ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಹೆಚ್ಚಿನ ಮಾಹಿತಿಗಾಗಿ theatreforliving.com ಭೇಟಿ ನೀಡಿ.

ಬೆಂಗಳೂರಿನಲ್ಲಿ ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಲಿವಿಂಗ್ (TfL) ಕಾರ್ಯಾಗಾರ
CCDC ಮತ್ತು ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಡೈಮಂಡ್ ಜನವರಿ 2 ಮತ್ತು ಜನವರಿ 17, 2017 ರ ನಡುವೆ ಒಟ್ಟು 15 ದಿನಗಳ ಮೂರು ಕಾರ್ಯಕ್ರಮಗಳನ್ನು ಒಟ್ಟಿಗೆ ನಡೆಸಿಕೊಡಲಿದ್ದಾರೆ:

Ø TfL ಒದಗಿಸುವ ತರಬೇತುದಾರ ತರಬೇತಿ, ಜನವರಿ 2 ರಿಂದ ಜನವರಿ 7, 2017: ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಲಿವಿಂಗ್ ನಲ್ಲಿ ಒಂದು ವಾರಾವಧಿಯ ತರಬೇತಿ. 30 ಭಾರತೀಯ ಹಾಗೂ ವಿದೇಶೀ ವ್ಯಕ್ತಿಗಳು ಭಾಗವಹಿಸಲಿದ್ದಾರೆ.

Ø 2 ಡಿಗ್ರೀಯ ಭಯ ಮತ್ತು ಬಯಕೆ, ಜನವರಿ 10, 2017: ಕಾಪ್ ಇನ್ ದ ಹೆಡ್ ತಂತ್ರ ಬಳಸಿಕೊಂಡು ಜಾಗತಿಕ ತಾಪಮಾನ ಏರಿಕೆಯ ಮೇಲೆ 1 ದಿನದ ಕಾರ್ಯಾಗಾರ.

Ø ಅಂಡರ್ ದಿ ಸ್ಪಾಟ್ಲೈಟ್ - ಮಾನಸಿಕ ಆರೋಗ್ಯ ಸಮಸ್ಯೆಗಳ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ರಂಗಭೂಮಿ ಆಧಾರಿತ ಪರಿಶೋಧನೆ, ಜನವರಿ 12-17: ಡಾ ಆರ್.ಎನ್. ಮೂರ್ತಿ ಫೌಂಡೇಶನ್ NIMHANSನ ಬೆಂಬಲದೊಂದಿಗೆ NIMHANSನ ಕ್ಲಿನಿಕಲ್ ಸೈಕಾಲಜಿ ಇಲಾಖೆ ಜೊತೆ CCDC ಸಹ ಆಯೋಜಿಸಲಾಗಿದೆ. ಈ ಕಾರ್ಯಾಗಾರದಲ್ಲಿ ಆಮಂತ್ರಣದ ಮೂಲಕ ಮಾತ್ರ ಭಾಗವಹಿಸಬಹುದು. 6 ದಿನದ ಈ ಕಾರ್ಯಾಗಾರ ಜನವರಿ 17, 2017 ರಂದು ಒಂದು ಸಂವಾದಾತ್ಮಕ ಸಾರ್ವಜನಿಕ ಫೋರಮ್ ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಪ್ರದರ್ಶನದೊಂದಿಗೆ ಕೊನೆಗೊಳ್ಳಲಿದೆ. ಈ ಫೋರಮ್ ಪ್ರದರ್ಶನಕ್ಕೆ ಎಲ್ಲರಿಗೂ ಆಹ್ವಾನವಿದೆ.

ನೋಂದಣಿ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ವಿವರಗಳಿಗಾಗಿ ದಯವಿಟ್ಟು ಲಾಗ್ ಆನ್ ಮಾಡಿ http://www.ccdc.in/theatre-for-living-workshops

"ಥಿಯೇಟರ್ ಫಾರ್ ಲಿವಿಂಗ್ ನ ಭಾಷೆ, ಬೆಂಗಳೂರಿನ ಜನರು ಮತ್ತು ಸಂಸ್ಕೃತಿಯನ್ನು ಭೇಟಿಮಾಡಿದಾಗ ಆಗಬಹುದಾದ ರೂಪಾಂತರಕ್ಕೆ" ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಡೈಮಂಡ್ ಎದುರುನೋಡುತ್ತಿದ್ದಾರೆ. "ಪರಿವರ್ತನೆಯ ಸಂಭಾಷಣೆ ಉತ್ತೇಜಿಸುವ ಯಾವ ರೀತಿಯ ಪ್ರಶ್ನೆಗಳನ್ನು ನಾವು ಒಂದು ಒಟ್ಟಿಗೆ ಕೇಳಬಹುದು? "

CCDC ಸ್ಥಾಪಕ ಟ್ರಸ್ಟಿ ರಾಧಾ ರಾಮಸ್ವಾಮಿ ಹೇಳುತ್ತಾರೆ, "ಮುಂದಿನ 15 ದಿನಗಳು ವಿಶಿಷ್ಟವಾದ ಕಲಿಕೆಯ ಅವಕಾಶವಾಗಿದೆ. ಭಾರತ ಹಾಗೂ ವಿದೇಶದ 30 ಜನರು ಡೇವಿಡ್ ಡೈಮಂಡ್ ರಿಂದಲೇ TfLನ ಭಾಷೆ ಕಲಿಯಲಿದ್ದಾರೆ. CCDC ಮಾನಸಿಕ ಆರೋಗ್ಯದ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಅರ್ಥಪೂರ್ಣ ಸಂಭಾಷಣೆ ನಡೆಸುವ ಕೆಲಸ ಮಾಡುತ್ತಿದೆ. ಹಾಗಾಗಿ ಅದು TfL ಈ ಕ್ರಿಯೆಯಲ್ಲಿ ಹೇಗೆ ಸಹಾಯ ಮಾಡಬಹುದು ಎಂದು ಕಲಿಯಲು ಕಾತುರವಾಗಿದೆ.

Centre for Community Dialogue and Change
A 6, Grasmere Apartments,
Osborne Road, Bangalore 560042
India
Tel: 080 23692168
contact@ccdc.in

Centre for Community Dialogue and Change brings to India
Workshops in Theatre for Living by David Diamond.

Centre for Community Dialogue and Change (CCDC), Bangalore, ushers in the New Year with yet another powerful theatre extravaganza, bringing the internationally acclaimed theatre facilitator David Diamond and his Theatre for Living to Bangalore. After hosting a highly successful national level Theatre of the Oppressed conference, Diversity Dialogues, in 2014, CCDC is back with a set of three workshops facilitated by David Diamond, from January 2 to January 17, 2017.

Centre for Community Dialogue and Change

CCDC is a Bangalore,India based organization promoting Theatre of the Oppressed. Used the world over as a creative tool for personal and social transformation, Theatre of the Oppressed was created by Brazilian theatre director Augusto Boal. It is a set of theatre games and exercises inspired by the ideas of the educationist, Paulo Freire, as articulated in his book, Pedagogy of the Oppressed. TO workshops create a space where individuals and communities come together to realise their potential to transform themselves and others.

You can read more about CCDC at www.ccdc.in

David Diamond and Theatre for Living

David Diamond is the founder and artistic director of Vancouver's Theatre for Living (formerly Headlines Theatre), which uses theatre to help communities tell their stories. Theatre for Living (Tfl) has evolved from Augusto Boal's Theatre of the Oppressed - moving away from the binary language and model of "oppressor/oppressed", it approaches community-based cultural work from a systems-based perspective. If we can reclaim cultural expression as part of our everyday vocabulary – a common language that we use to tell our own collective stories – we are one step closer to being balanced as individuals and as communities.

David has worked with many groups around the world including First Nations, refugees, women's groups, environmentalists, street youth, health practitioners, and people who are homeless. He has worked throughout Canada, the USA and Europe, besides Namibia, New Zealand, Australia, Brazil, Rwanda, Palestine and Singapore, and has pioneered the development of live, interactive Forum television and web casting.

David is the recipient of numerous awards, including the City of Vancouver's Cultural Harmony
Award, the Jessie Richardson Award for Innovation in Theatre, an Honorary Doctorate from the
University of the Fraser Valley and the Otto René Castillo Award for Political Theatre.

David is a Visiting Faculty Member at the Master of Arts Program in Peace, Development, Security and International Conflict Transformation at the UNESCO Chair for Peace Studies, University of Innsbruck, Austria, and Visiting Theatre Director at the Faculty of Medicine and Dentistry, University of Alberta.

For more on Tfl please visit theatreforliving.com

The Theatre for Living (TfL) workshops in Bangalore, India.

CCDC and David Diamond will come together for 15 days between January 2 and January 17, 2017 with three programmes:

 The TfL Facilitator Training, January 2 to January 7, 2017 : a weeklong training in Theatre for Living for 30 participants from across India and abroad.

 2 Degrees of Fear and Desire, January 10, 2017 : a 1-day workshop on global warming using the Cop in the Head theatrical exercise.

 Under the Spotlight - An Exploration of Mental Health Issues, January 12-17 : co-organised by CCDC with the Department of Clinical Psychology, NIMHANS, with support from Dr RN Moorthy Foundation, NIMHANS. Participation in this workshop is by invitation only. The intensive 6-day workshop will culminate in an interactive public Forum Theatre performance by the participants on January 17, 2017.

For details regarding registration please log on to: http://www.ccdc.in/theatre-for-living-workshops

David Diamond is "Looking forward to seeing how the language of Theatre for Living transforms as it encounters the people and culture in Bangalore. What kind of questions can we ask together that stimulate a transformational dialogue? "

“The next 15 days offer exciting learning opportunities" says Radha Ramaswamy, Founder Trustee of CCDC, “30 people from across India will learn the language of TfL from David Diamond himself. We are also looking forward to learning how TfL can help create meaningful dialogues around mental health, an area that CCDC is strongly committed to.”

ಕಮಲ

ಮೊಗ್ಗಾಗಿದ್ದೆ
ಅರಳುವವಳಿದ್ದೆ
ನೀವು ಹೇಳುವಂತೆ ಬಲಿತಿದ್ದೆ

ಅರಳುವ ಮೊದಲೇ
ತಾಯಿ ಬೇರಿಂದ
ಹೂಗಾರನ ಬುಟ್ಟಿಸೇರಿದ್ದೆ

ನಿಮ್ಮ ಪೂಜೆ
ನಿಮ್ಮ ನೆಮ್ಮದಿ
ನನ್ನ ಖಂಡಾಂತರ ಪ್ರಯಾಣ

ದೊಡ್ಡ ಪೂಜಾರಿಯ
ಒರಟು ಕೈಗಳಲ್ಲಿ
ನನ್ನ ಕನಸುಗಳ ಅವಸಾನ

ಹೊರ ಪಕಳೆಗಳ ಕಿತ್ತು
ಒಳಗಿನದನ ಬಿಡಿಸಿ
ಬಲವಂತದಿ ನನ್ನ ಹೂವಾಗಿಸಿ

ಮಂತ್ರಘೋಷ
ಭಕ್ತಿ ಭಾವದಿಂದ
ಹಿಡಿದೆನ್ನ ದೇವರ ಮೇಲೇರಿಸಿ

ಮರುದಿನಕ್ಕೆ ನಾನು
ಕಸವಾಗುವ ನಿರ್ಮಾಲ್ಯ
ನಿಮಗಿನ್ನು ನನ್ನ ಚಿಂತೆಯಿಲ್ಲ

ನಾ ಹುಟ್ಟಿದಾ ಕೆರೆಗೇ
ನಾನೀಗ ಮಾಲಿನ್ಯ
ಒಳಗುಳಿದ ಬದುಕಿನ್ನೂ ಸತ್ತಿಲ್ಲ

ಭಾಶೆ

Karma’s ways to bite

He cheated and moved
I was sad and bruised
I missed his company
But life got its symphony

Came back with request
On social media to connect
At my level, Manager
Grown, it looked meager

I took a step, went up
He again had to catch up
Maybe he took a turn
Devious plans he did churn

Karma has its ways to bite
In a “name” it showed its might
Is his memory his foe?
Karma, I take a bow

BhaShe

Molehill

While I sit and make a mountain out of a molehill
Over friends who haven’t called and checked on me
There are girls who are sold by their dads
To pimps, to be trafficked to Mumbai’s sex districts

Who was there to take care of her anyway?
The women her father slept with hated her
The men her mother slept with have lusted her
Other elders in the society have groped her

It’s just another way of life, a job, an income
Just go, stay, earn and send the money back
Some hungry mouths here have food in their plates
You stay there, do what you do, don’t come back

Who knows, she might find a family there too
A sister who shares the pain of being sold
A mother who has aborted many a times, cold
A friend, to confess, to cry, to talk and to hold

Will I ever grow enough to see a molehill as a molehill?
And enough to see what is and how big a mountain is
Or will I stay listening to all of it as if it is a story
And believe, I live in a universe far away from all that is

BhaShe

Flower

I brew nectar at odd hours of nights
You would have a message when the day breaks
A bowl of peace handed to you with a smile

I breathe the fullest at odd hours of nights
You would have my strong scent when the day breaks
Filling you up with a fresh mood for the rest of the day

I make colors and paint myself at odd hours of nights
You would see the best of me when the day breaks
Still carrying sparkle from countless stars I watched

I make my world a little better at odd hours of nights
Every morning when you wake up, you get to see
How me being 'me' is one step closer to serenity

BhaShe

Shishila – The Destination

The Desire:
About 4 or 5 years ago, I, appa, amma and Ankith went to a place called Nanya Bhairaveshwar. The ride was beautiful. It is about 25 kms away from my home and is a beautiful place. We had been there in the evening and we looked around. That is when I first saw the peak of Shishila. What a sight it was! As soon as I saw that peak, I wanted to climb to the top of it. I started suggesting that we should go there. Amma and appa tried convincing me that it was a bad idea to start at that hour. When I started making a fuss about it, appa made it very clear that it is not a viable idea. It was getting late and we had to walk in the wild to go to the top and without a guide there is a high possibility that we could be lost. I had to succumb, I had no power over this argument and we returned. For a minute I had the thought of wanting to get married on that hill top.



The Revival:
Last September when I was home, I spoke about my long lasting desire to climb the Shishila hilltop and Chetu helped me with Raju’s number. Raju is a villager in Bhairapura village (which is the nearest) and also acts as a guide to visitors. He spoke about leaches and other problems and suggested that we should plan to go there in November or December.

The Journey:
27th December 2015, me, appa and ankith left home at 12:00 noon. A junction near Agriculture College, before Mudigere, we took a left to go towards Bhairapura. At every junction we asked for directions and we were misguided once. We travelled extra for about 2 kms in the wrong direction and because we asked for directions all the way, we got back to the right road soon. After a while, in the next junction, where we asked for directions yet again, we could look at the Shishila hill top. Ankith noticed the excitement on my face and mentioned it was so much, as though I had already climbed up to the top.

We reached Nanya Bhairaveshwara temple and called up Raju. Oh! You will be lucky if you find any mobile network there, and we were lucky for a while.

The Disappointment:
Raju mentioned that wild elephants had been there at 10:30 in the morning. As we were only 3, he suggested it is better we go back now and come again in a group, instead of the planned adventure. We strolled for a few minutes, saw the way to the hilltop which goes inside the forest, and decided to go back. We could see elephant dump and the havoc they had created that morning, some broken trees, broken twigs and smashed bushes. It was enough proof for us to vouch our decision. We came back to the place where we had parked our bikes and started eating watermelon we carried.

Angels Arrived:
A toofan arrived with 17 people in it. Yes, you read it right, 17, aged between 10 and 45. 13 of them said they are going to climb Shishila. We all jumped out of joy and joined them. It did not take much time for us to get friendly. Together we started walking towards our common destination.
The path in the forest was well made but there were places where we had to walk up on dusty, stone filled roads. It was very slippery and very tiring. Once we crossed the forest it was again an uphill climb and it was extremely exhausting. Ankith held my hand and encouraged me to climb up, “a little more and we will be on flat land”, he would say.




I was breathless by the time I reached the flatland. It indeed was flatland and I rested for a while. Then, the next step was to climb to the peak. Appa said he won’t go up and suggested that I too stay back. I did not want to give up, after going so close. The kids started climbing fast and I took my time to go up. This time appa was with me, asking me to be careful and helping me climb. This was not tiring but very risky. It’s a steep climb and one miss step could lead to a disaster.

I did reach the top successfully along with appa. Ankith had already reached and had clicked some photos too. It took an hour to climb and what a view it was! We could see South Canara border from the top. This day and all its efforts were all worth it. Though not clear, we could still see range of mountains. We could see a river and a water falls at a distant location and we could see beauty in all directions.



It took lesser time to climb down, a small break and step two, and we had reached the gateway to the forest. We all gathered together and walked together as that was our best chance of survival in case wild elephants paid a visit. Four people who had stayed back had watched us climb the hill top and were waiting for us. We said a ton load of thanks to all of them and bid goodbye.

Known Turf:
You might have noticed I said very little about food, because we had very little. On our way back we ate some biscuits and drank some water. It was almost 5:30 and we were in a hurry to get back.

Our way back, we found new connecting roads. From Bhairapura we went towards Devavrunda circle, from there to Jannapura and finally to Gonibeedu. We followed the same protocol of asking for directions all the way till we reached the Devavrunda circle. Dad geared up, “no need to ask anyone for directions” he speeded up. We reached back home, tired, content and me, a dream fulfilled.

PS: Photo credit Ankith H S

Missing Periods

No! I haven’t missed one
I am not pregnant
It takes a month to come
And I am missing it

I dream of periods
Blood on my hands
Blood between my thighs
To feel “fresh again”

Unbearable pain
My only desire is to rest
It is uncomfortable
An excuse, at its best

But when it comes
It comes with peace
Hormones working
Settling mood swings

I miss my periods
It’s so much fun
It’s such a roller-coaster
Also, it’s a stress buster

BhaShe

High on Cheese

Unfit pumping machine
Clogged passages
A vicious circle
Loop, repeat
I get high on cheese

Hundred rules
More complications
Heart, mind fights
Pinches at wrong places
I get high on cheese

Know the pitfalls
Nature’s calls
Going large from small
Forgetting the stroll
I get high on cheese

Not a relief or medicine
Neither a solution
Harmful than known
But compulsion driven
I get high on cheese

BhaShe

The Light will come

In the middle of the night
When it’s dark and sleepy
I sit up and make my living

No, it’s not the need
It’s not even the money
It’s only the desire

Satisfaction, silly thing
It’s a desert mirage
Almost there, but never

No enlightenment
Middle of the nights
Serve only the strivers

As every night passes
Am close to the end
But I remain there

The light I seek
Will come to me
When I am about to sleep

BhaShe

Impotent

His tongue is a sword, criminal mind
Words chosen wisely to play his games
He rules my world, the only area he is competent
Rest all, you will read below, he is impotent

Whatever he touches turns to dust
He always makes all wrong choices
He is the reverse of Midas touch
In these many years, he is financially impotent

He does not understand heart beats
Neither his heart, nor his mind works
Nothing that should, make an impact on him
Making it obvious, he is emotionally impotent

Sperm production has come to a halt
Smoke and booze has killed his capacity
His thing refuses to stand and do its work
I suffer, he is physically impotent

Intertwined and tangled are our lives
Troubles everywhere, no solutions
Stuck at a point, now I ponder
Has he turned me in to an incompetent?

BhaShe

Two Cups of Joy

“Two Cups of Joy” it’s said
Two cups of poison too
Oozes milk out and
Poison in, sometimes

Genetics gift
Nature’s wrath
Sometimes a warning
Unknown path

Act, take a step
You matter
Make an informed choice
Part of the barter

Fight or flee
Surrender or kill
I did all I could
It was his will

My body
I will know
I will look after
I will show

BhaShe

Heartbreak Season

Am I shielded?
Or am I numb?

What are you seeking?
I infer, search signs
I dip my fingers in paint
Paintings happen

I walk same roads
Same lessons
Are you attempting my failure?
Hard nut

Breaking my hopes
By their tail
My middle finger talks
And I let it

Bleeding toe nails
Leave trail
Though I walk off
I remain

BhaShe

Mesmerized

When I see you light up the world
I can’t resist but follow you
I punish myself for my acts with silence

The boundaries I set for myself
Are broken, I feel your pull
What magic have you done to me?

I try to chase you away from my mind
While I meditate, when I see you, I name you,
You resist to leave my mind, ever

I try to be angry, I try to hate you, punish you
But when I see your eyes go sad
I fail to stick to the promises made to self

I wonder what you are, who you are
Where have you come from and what’s your purpose
I am too shy to talk to you, question you

My heart runs around you like a lost puppy
My eyes smile when I see your face
What am I supposed to do?

You are too beautiful to resist
Your childlike smile and behavior
Makes me want to love you

BhaShe

ಕಳೆದುಹೋಗಿದೆಯೊಂದು ಖಜಾನೆ

ಹೊಸರುಚಿ ಮಾಡುವ ಕಾತರ
ಹಲವು ಹಳೇ ರುಚಿಗಳ ಆಗರ
ಯಾವ ಖಾಯಿಲೆಗೂ ಇದೆ ಮದ್ದು
ಹಂಚೀಕಡ್ಡಿಯ ದೃಷ್ಟಿ, ಕೆನ್ನೆ ಮೇಲೆ ಮುತ್ತು

ಮಕ್ಕಳೆಂದರೆ ಅಪರಿಮಿತ ಪ್ರೀತಿ
"ಬಾರೋ ಬಂಗಾರ" ಅವರು ಕರೆವ ರೀತಿ
ಜೀವನದಿ ಎಂದೂ ಮುಗಿಯದ ಆಸಕ್ತಿ
ಹಲವೊಮ್ಮೆ ತಂದಿಟ್ಟಿದೆ ಫಜೀತಿ

ಕ್ರೋಶಾದಲ್ಲಿ ಸ್ವೆಟರ್ ನ ಕೌಶಲ್ಯ
ಅವರ ಮಾತು, ಅನುಭವ ಅಮೂಲ್ಯ
ಬರೆಯಲಾಗದ್ದು ಅವರ ಭಾಂದವ್ಯ
ಅವರಿದ್ದಿದ್ದಷ್ಟೇ ನಮ್ಮ ಸೌಭಾಗ್ಯ

ಕಿತ್ತಳೆ, ಸೀಬೆ, ಬೀನ್ಸ್, ಸೌತೆಕಾಯಿ,
ಸಪೋಟ, ತೆಂಗು, ಮಾವು, ಪಪ್ಪಾಯ
ಹಣ್ಣು, ತರಕಾರಿ, ತೋಟ ಅವರ ಆಶಯ
ಅಜ್ಜಿಯ ಶಕ್ತಿ, ಯುಕ್ತಿಯ ವಿಜಯ

ಮಲೆನಾಡಿಗೆ ಬಂದು ಮನೆ ದೀಪವಾದರು
ಅಜ್ಜನ ಮನೆಯ ಶಕ್ತಿ, ದೀಪ್ತಿಯಾದರು
ಬಂಧು ಬಳಗಕ್ಕೆಲ್ಲಾ ಪ್ರೀತಿ ಹಂಚಿದರು
ಸಾವನ್ನು ಬೇಡಿ ಪಡೆದು ಮರೆಯಾದರು

ನಮ್ಮ ಹೃದಯದಲ್ಲಿ ಹಾಡಾಗಿರುವ ಪದ್ಮಮ್ಮ
ಕತೆ, ಎಣ್ಣೆ ನೀರು, ಕೆಲಸದ ಕೈ ಅಜ್ಜಮ್ಮ
ನಮ್ಮ ಕಣ್ಣಿಂದ ನೀವು ಹೀಗೆ ಮರೆಯಾದರೂ
ನಿಮ್ಮನ್ನು ಯಾರೂ ಮರೆಯಲಾರರು

ನಿಮ್ಮ ಬೆಳಕು

ಭಾಶೆ

Seed in Your Stomach

I am a seed in your stomach
You cannot digest me
You did not chew me on my way down
You saved your life and mine

The fruit that had me, was sweet
I guessed you were terribly hungry
You gobbled and swallowed
Like a hungry animal

Did you know I was poison?
Or you just randomly swallowed?
Now that I came untouched
I cannot kill you either

I will move out of your system
Not harmed, not harming
I will have enough fertilizer and moist
To make a life out of me

Are you just a lucky ass?
Or a learned know-it-all?
As you have managed
To save two lives at once.

BhaShe

The Storm has Passed

The storm has passed

Busy erasing the scars, that
Making memories have halted
Refresh, start over, and leave the scars alone

Have been traveling the whole night
Direction west
Do I see a tinge of orange in my mirror?
Like light moves in circles
Have I taken a U turn?
Am I back at where I started?
But with a different direction

Some tunnels on my way were so lit
That I forgot sun
Sun, who lights up the whole world
Sometimes it is so cloudy
Sun does not make a difference at all

It is the light inside me
That is lighting up my world
It is the god inside me
That is keeping me alive

Forget and ban the sounds from outside
Let me hear the voices from my stomach
It is not easy; I am tuned out till now
But I hear a static, I hear noises
Am sure, I will tune in, soon,

Reflections are guiding me
They are taking me places
When in dark, I see light
And I see reflections too
Bat ears and cat eyes

The storm has passed
Is it time to settle down?
Is it time to prepare for another one?
I shake myself off the dust
Thinking I am a phoenix
And I wonder

BhaShe

By the End

Stay away,
You don’t belong here
I close my doors on you
I need no pain

Shed those bags
Those and more
But even then
You are not really free

I am afraid of you
I am excited by you
I am confused by this
And I am working my sheet

Balance sheet in the process
Assets and liabilities
Yours and mine
It is in progress

Wait outside the door
I take time to do my math
Only if I see a profit
Will I let you inside

Stay where you are
Don’t push any buttons
I haven’t yet figured out
You might just be nothing

You might just be
A beautifully packed pain
An absent dream
A no one and nothing by the end

BhaShe

White Sheet

I stare at a white sheet
Not knowing what to write

When hurt is a tumor in my throat
When I have been the scapegoat
When the wounds won’t heal, but rot
I stare, not knowing what to write

When my ears drums are bombarded
Every emotion gets aborted, retarded
Remedies I try fail as soon as they are started
I stare, not knowing what to write

Though I desire to wish away pain
For peace, love, harmony to remain
Journey to unknown currents to detain
I stare, not knowing what to write

Are his doors open for me, I wonder
Have I missed his call, his murmur?
Will I find my soul, my peace, inside, under?
I stare, not knowing what to write

BhaShe

Between Lines

I can keep reading
Between the lines
Till lines are written

Move your hands
Write more lines
Leave me dots to connect

It’s like studying
Handwriting
Content, does not matter

All I need
Is you to keep writing
So I can keep reading

If you stop and let go
My foundation is shaken
My castles would fall down

I stack up
Books, sheets, pens
And refreshments

You are writing my life
I cease to live
When your pen stops

BhaShe

The bitch inside, does not die

When it rains outside
The darkness inside emerges
Swallowing the goodness
Showing all wildness

When a thunderstorm passes by
We get enough air to breathe
That’s when our feet is on ground
That’s when we feel challenged

When it’s dark and cold outside
We use some drinks
Take cold from outside as ice
And dark as drink, sip by sip

When a volcano erupts
We warm our hands and legs
Put it out in one breath
Like squashing a cigarette

The bitch inside, does not die
It comes out when we decide
We are angels otherwise
The bitch inside, does not die

BhaShe

Pushed out of my dreamland

Pushed out of my dreamland
To reality
I realize

I am tiny little person
On the face of earth
I ponder about

Significance of my existence
Purpose of life
Importance of emotions
Source of peace

I realize that I am this human
With 2 legs and 2 hands
And I am like everybody
And everybody is like me

I am nothing different
But unique
I am one among the group
But doesn’t belong

Why I laugh or cry
Or happy or sad
Or disheartened
Or angry with what?

I persistently search
For the door back to my dreamland
To remain there, as I was
And not be part of reality.

BhaShe

Beauty

It’s like walking on a mud road
Holding a stick in my hand
Along my foot steps
It draws a line, a mark - temporary

It’s like having a song in my ears
It’s humming to me, am humming it
Am swirled in its melody and lyrics
It’s stuck to my mood and mind

It’s like walking with the breeze
Letting it play with my hair
Feeling it all around me
Seeing it through my closed eyes

It’s a feeling inside
That gives me goose bumps
Not knowing what it exactly is
But knowing it is very dear to me

May be, I have fallen in love
Fallen in love with the new found self
May be, I have starting loving me more
A lot more than I ever did

BhaShe

I dream

I dream of being that one special friend of yours
With whom you lay your heart open
To protect you, care for you and be with you
And build a bridge that is unshakeable

I dream of being your life partner
In joys and sorrows and much more
To love you eternally and be loved by you
To have my world weaved around you

I dream of being your wife, the better half
Share all that I have with you
Have my name carry yours with it
And be your eternal partner

I dream of being your soul mate
Be your heart beat, be your breath
Be the one that you can always trust
And be attached to you, forever

I dream of being soil for your seeds
To grow you, inside me,
To connect with you in such a way
That we can never be separated

I dream of you, about you, of being yours
I dream every day, night, minute, second
All I do is dream and dream about you
And await for you to ask for my hand.

BhaShe

Inspired and Dedicated

Calling

Somewhere someone awaits your call
Oh! Confused soul
Reach out to your destiny
As she awaits you

She is bound
By her golden chains
You hold the keys
To unlock her
From her miseries

She too desires
What you desire
But only if you could
Whisper those magical words
In her ears
She would be released

She is crippled
But has a strong will at heart
Hold her hands once
She will break her crutches
And walk with you

Winter has passed
It is the time of spring
It is the time of spring
Open your eyes to the new world
Claim what is rightly yours
Claim your destiny

Oh! Confused soul
Possessor of good fortune
She is calling you
Rise above your limitations
Rise above your inhibitions
She shall be yours, forever

BhaShe

Are you scared?

Are you scared that
One fine morning
I might ring your door bell
Stand in front of you
Lay my heart
On your feet
And bind you
Forever

The love I have
Is impossible to deny
And you will accept
Let me inside your life
Which was
Just yours
Till now

You may fall
Head over heals
In love with me
And I would know
Your flaws
Weakness
Like your soul

That we may grow
So dependent on each
That death
When it takes me
Would take your soul too
Along with mine and
You would be empty
For ever

Are you scared of me?
Of falling in love with me?
Of loving me?
Of being mine, forever
And staying that way!
Are you?

BhaShe

Realization

When I walk those lonely roads,
Watch those misty lights beam light out
Feel the chill air on my nose, cheeks and feet
I think about you

When I smell coffee brewing
When I hear petals crack and spread aroma
Blossoms flowering
I miss you

When I stand in my balcony
Listen to wind and chirping birds
Wonder about the green color of leaves
I ponder about you

Every time I breathe fresh air
Every time I hear my heart beat
Every sound, color and feeling I see
I realize, I am madly in love with you

BhaShe

Persuasion

You are a water bubble
You are a butterfly
You are a hint of rainbow
On a moody evening sky

You are a paper boat
Filled with glitter and light
Sailing on my river of life
Tickling my funny bones

You are a clear dream
You are a distant reality
You are an unsolved puzzle
Going round and round in my head

You are my inspiration
You are my motivation
You are the door half open
Result of my persuasion

BhaShe

Inspired & Dedicated Love Poems

Love Race

It is a tortoise and rabbit race
But towards each other
I have crossed my half long time back
I await your reach on the joining line

Every step you take towards me
Pulls me close to you
Am held back at the joining line
I can’t wait anymore

You move very slowly
Think and ponder on your way
Look up and see me once in a while
And lost in your thoughts otherwise

Every passing second is a year
Every feet is a decade to pass
Am holding my heart in my hands
Just to make it yours as soon as you reach

BhaShe

Love Story

I am butterfly
I am flower
I am the nectar that flows
I am colors
I am shade
I am the transition between

I am you
I am him
I am everything that connects
I am love
I am pain
I am all other feelings in between

I am your mirror
I am his shade
I am the grey between black and white
I am his question
I am your answer
I am the string that runs through the dots

I am bird
I am tree
I am the dry twig that becomes nest
I am soul
I am heart
And I am the universe that binds both

I am your ears
I am his words
I am the air that carries it all
I am him in you
I am you in him
I am the idea of you two, together

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

Inspired and Dedicated

Running on Autopilot

The lanes I travel
Have arrow marks for instructions
The things I do
Come with a process handbook

System created fire extinguisher
For what happens in my belly
It is cold outside, snowing
Warm clothes protect my body

It creeps out in every direction
I try to grab it all back and put inside
Breezy, windy and it flows
I lose a little bit in every explosion

The ties are lose and tight
I sprained my neck, back and ankles
Those horses run so very fast
My hands bleed holding control

Am I running on autopilot mode?
Defined emotions for every situation
Am I free? Am I at my will? Or
Whatever I think is also programmed?

BhaShe

Snatched Away

Locked up in a box
Kept in a safe
I believed I have you
Forever

Least did I know
That you could move
Space and distance
That fast

How many lives did you take
How many hearts did you break
When you walked
Bare foot,
Away

Family and friends
Lovers and haters
Walking dead bodies
With lifeless lives

Even if it was known
The thread that binds
Has thinned down

What could anyone do
When the one snatching you
Was nothing but death

You went in seconds
Leaving those hearts
Empty forever

BhaShe

See-through

When I look in the mirror
I see, I resemble my mom a little
Yes, I carry her legacy
Sometimes I see her softness in my eyes

My mom’s sisters peep in too
Her forehead, or her stern look
All that I carry is borrowed
What is it that is just mine?

I will have a piece of them in me
When they leave their bodies and move on
I hope I will see my mom in me
Hear her voice and feel her warmth

Is that all it is? One pillar to another?
Genes and qualities that percolate down?
Seems as if it’s a mission to carry
And pass what I have carried, further.

BhaShe

Help

Others, needy, poor
Distressed, destroyed, dreaded
I say I helped
How can I be so proud?

When destiny rocked my boat
When I was unable to stay afloat
When I was sunk till my throat
Could I help myself?

If I were to be poor
If I were unhappy and sore
Then how would have I felt
When I was being helped

Am I superior because I can help?
Take credit, gloat, and yelp
Why not I think how foolish I am
To believe that I actually help

Isn’t it all just his master plan?
Give a lot to someone otherwise nothing at all
To teach us how to share and care
And see the world without vapor

BhaShe

Anticipation

I drink my poison
Sip by sip
Only with the hope
That one day
You will save me

I walked miles to stand in front of your door
Hesitant to knock
I stand there
Waiting
You will have to come out
One or the other day
Or do you have a secret way out?

I hear your voice, your noise
When you walk with so much energy
Jump out of joy, happiness, and laugh
I hear the activities inside your house
Behind those walls, which I have not crossed

I dream about
How you may look
How you may talk
How you may hold me
Take me inside your house
How your house would look
About everything
That I have not seen

The doorbell rings, so many times
All those who have come
After me
But rang the bell
Have gotten inside
Have left the building
With changes in them
I see them with curious eyes
If I can find
Any impression of yours on them

I have carried it both
The good and the bad
As they rot, get stale
I sit and wish to see you
And only that
As I sip my poison

BhaShe

Badnam(e)

When you think of me, by mistake
When you remember my smile
When you write my name
Don’t write it next to yours
I don’t want the stain of my name to stain yours

Don’t tell your friends or family
That you are my friend
That we hangout sometimes
That we share a healthy chat
They will see stains on a blank white paper

No photos with me, never
Save my number with a different name
Any conversation we have had
Remains within 4 walls and dies
You cannot identify with me

You may know a little of what I am
You may know a little of what I was and could be
But they always believe
They know me through and through
Whatever you may claim, they will dismiss

No rain could wash off the stains my name has
No miracle could change their views about me
I have accepted and I can live with it
I have grown strong, I don’t care
But you, don’t become my weakness now

BhaShe

From a Distance

Standing at a distance,
I see myself changing

Those miles I have walked
Carrying emotional baggage
Those ups and downs I have crossed
I feel strength in my legs

Every tear drop on the way
Has turned in to a diamond
Every sweat drop
Is now a goldmine

My baggage is getting reduced
I feel light, as I walk further
Though tomorrow looks scary
It looks beautiful and interesting too

Every smile I had on the way
Makes me smile, even today
It’s a never ending saree am draping
Changing the way I look, everyday

Only from a distance, I can see all these
What a beautiful journey life has been
I know am here to learn, to become more
I know, my path, is just and green

BhaShe

Unspoken

On your words
Am making my world
Kindly be honest now
Tell me how many truths
And how many lies

I have closed my eyes
Said my goodbyes
Ready to step further
Am I coming closer?
Or going farther?

You have spun me around
I’ve gone up and down
Kaleidoscope in my eyes
I feel as if
I’ve just stepped out of a dream

You have ignited new feelings
Evoked new dreams
Shown me trailers of a world
That I had never seen
Am walking on clouds

Am weaving my dreams
To fit your size
Kindly be honest now
Should I continue?
Or should I cease?

BhaShe

Expressionless

Spiders crawl up my back bone
I feel the chills
Are they spiders?
They've latched on to me
Are they sucking my blood?

I feel nothing on my back
Did those creatures die?
Was my blood venom?
Or is it the numbness
From their venomous biting

I feel am walking on the clouds
Wind in my hair
Light as a feather
I don't feel any weight
Am I dead?

BhaShe

Begging for Apology

Say sorry once more please…

This time I won’t turn my face
I won’t walk away and make you chase
I’ll accept it and give you a kiss
Those romantic times, I too miss

You know that I know now, I was wrong
I held on to my statement too very strong
The silence has created a huge gap
Let’s finish the fight, let’s cut the crap

I know you apologized a million times
Every time I played different, false pride
Now I see it has gone too long
Ego melted, am not any strong

Say sorry once more, I beg you
Boost my ego a bit, am dying for you
I want you more than you could have ever thought
Let’s kill the silence, just hold my hand.

BhaShe

Emotionally damaged generation

“Think before you have an affair, if she is a girl or a ‘beeped word!” – A statement made by someone I know. He has just had a breakup from a 2+ year long relationship, he is 24.

“She makes those statements and I am unable to breakup with her, it has become so tiring” – he is trying for a breakup from a 3+ year relationship, she cheated on him, he is 23 and so is she.

“She wants to get married but I am not settled in life yet, I let her go” it’s a mutual decision, it was a 5+ year relationship, and he is hurt, he is 24 and she is 25.

“I don’t know if I should be with him anymore or not, it has become a duty and burden in my life”, she is 23, and has been in this relationship for the last 7 years.

Every youngster I meet these days, has a boyfriend / girlfriend, and there is some trauma in their life because of these relationships.

Kids today, fall in love early, try everything out, experiment with relationships, have multiple of them. Kids suffer, don’t they? Is, having relationships at early ages leading to an “emotionally damaged generation”? Is it helping them or harming?

Will it help them learn to be strong what may come? Help them to get a balanced life where emotions do not tangle with practical decisions? Where kids understand themselves well and mature quickly? Are there any benefits of having these many relationships and these many break-ups?

If I am not wrong, during earlier days, falling in love was not common, and the ones who did, fought to get married and continued to have a committed life. There was stability, trust, and a strong foundation to build any relationship. It was healthy.

Today, kids start to have “that one person” when they are 10 or 11 years old. As time passes, many “that one person” happen in their lives. Mental, physical, emotional attachments happen and break.

Will this leave today’s kids unable to have a rock solid relationship that our parents had? Trust becoming a big issue in life? Will it lead to a day where it is all open marriages and any kind of relationship with anyone is accepted?

I see these relationships and trauma harms them, damages them, and troubles them. Jilted lovers killing themselves, their ex-lovers, taking revenge and the number of such cases, supports the fact that they are getting emotionally damaged.

Are we in the making of an “emotionally damaged generation”??

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

Check List – For Happiness - In a Relationship

Love leads to marriage, right? And that is a long process, with a long courtship. This long courtship gives lot of room for people to grow, people to change. So, we all know not all the love stories become marriage stories. There is no ‘if, then’ to it, or that is what we want to believe. Anyway, here is a list of areas on which two people in a relationship should think, I think.

This also has some points that focus more on areas when you are thinking of taking your relationship to the next level. I have written as if I am telling all these to a girl. (Boys, modify and use all that applies)

1. Your happiness is important

a. Any physical abuse, mental torture, threatening, black mailing, a slightest hint of any of this is a signal you should think about the relationship

b. If you are not happy with the relationship, then it will not work anyway. I know it’s hard, but people change, things, circumstances, emotions, feelings all of these change. Do a rain check!

c. Don’t do it because you decided, committed, promised and want to stick to your decision. When the feeling is not driving it, the decision will not hold on for long.

2. Don’t stick to a relationship

a. Just because you had sex

b. Because you lost your virginity to that person

c. Because you are scared to break up

d. Because, every time you want to move on, you are being convinced to stay!

3. It is ok to break up

a. Are you with him only because you have been with him for so long now that you cannot think of anything else but adjust to anything and everything that comes up?

b. When you are not happy, when you have considered all possibilities and you see that it is not going to work in the long run, it is good to break up now. It will cause pain in the short run, but it will be for your long term good.

4. How open is he about the relationship

a. If you are asked to hide it all, you should think about it. When it is established that you two are with each other, hiding it from your friends is not something that will be asked for.

5. Do you trust him?

a. Is he a liar? Does he get angry often? Is he emotionally balanced? Is he possessive? Clings on too much? Runs away from you when you are in trouble? Talks a lot but fails to perform or deliver? Can you really invest all your emotions for a life with him? Look at the long term and the big picture when you are thinking of taking it to another level.

6. Does he have a bright future? Can he manage a family by himself in some days?

a. How does he manages his finances is not only about what he spends on you, but mainly on how much he saves, invests, plans for the future and so on. Don’t get blinded by the colors you see.

b. You might end up having a kid in a year or two, might end up quitting your job, might end up in need of finances, and is he responsible enough to manage all these?

7. What kind of family is he from?

a. Though caste might play its role, I am not talking about that here. Knowing how open his family is, how this relationship will be accepted, how educated and cultured are his family members’, these things help a lot. There has to be a match between how you have been brought up and how that family is.

8. Will his and your parents accept this relationship whole heartedly?

a. Though you might think now that we two will live by ourselves, we will not need any support from any side of the family, when problems crop up, it may seem difficult to manage. If not for anything else, you would need some emotional support from immediate families. So, knowing if this relation will be accepted whole heartedly is a must.

9. Do you respect him and does he respects you?

a. When in love, you look at love, romance and other colorful things. But to have a relationship last for a lifetime, the other qualities that matter a lot are trust and respect for each other. Do you value each others opinions, give space, respect each other and trust each other? If not, think again before you move further.

10. Does he shows how much he loves you or is it just words?

a. Does he talk colorful stuff but makes excuses, trust me it is going to continue forever. Believe in that you see, what is delivered, what was done, more than what you hear, what was told, promised or planned.

11. Does he take responsibilities at home and lives up to a mature human being?

a. Does he own a dog? A fish tank? Some pet? Has he trained his dog, cleans up after the dog, feeds it, takes it for a walk every day, in total, can he take responsibilities and manage them?

b. Does he helps his mom or dad or is he the “get me the towel” when in the shower types?

12. How do you manage your finances and emotions connected to it?

a. Does he gifts’ you so much that you feel indebted?
b. Have you been with him even before you started working and he gave you money?
c. Do you pay him a lot? Does he make up reasons to ask you money?
d. How does the equation remain when you both work?
Money does has a very strong influence on relationships

13. How is his value system?

a. I don’t care for anyone else but you, really? Then he might not care for you too very soon.
b. I don’t care about the money, what matters is your happiness! He may be stealing someone elses happiness to make you happy.
c. Do you both have similar values about material and emotional stuff?
d. Understand what he values and what not.

14. It’s ok, if you don’t marry ever!

a. Yes, why not? If you are independent and know you can be by yourself all long, then go ahead and be firm. The people who love you, who matter to you, and whom your happiness matters, they will understand this. Don’t care about others.

15. Think again, why are you in this relationship now?

a. Oh, I started it when I was 14 and I can’t imagine my life without him, even though we are not in happy terms now
b. I wanted to teach a lesson to my parents, friends, someone else
c. All my friends have a relationship, how can I be alone?
d. Oh! He is the best charmer at my college/work place/ etc. Though I know he might be cheating on me, I like the attention I get for being with him
e. Oh, we know it won’t work, but we really can’t stop ourselves!
f. I can adjust to anything that comes my way
g. We had sex and since then I see him as my husband
h. I am threatened, forced and compelled to be in this relationship
i. Think again why you are in this relationship!


Share, ask for help, make an informed decision, it is your life, after all. Consider your happiness too.

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

Taking the Leap; blindly – My life is mine after all!!!

“Suma has taken sanyasa and has left to an ashram in a remote place in Kerala / Tamil Nadu”.

Today, Akshaya Tritiya, I was at the inauguration of the new temple building at the mutt. I went there to offer my prayers and be there for few minutes. I love that place anyway. I went there by 4:45 times and went to the prayer hall straight; where a lot of devotees were chanting some stotras. I saw “P” there, one of my friends from the Mutt. She went out of the prayer hall and I followed her just to catch up with her. As soon as I approached her, she got excited and started off, “how are you akka? It has been so long, you have not come here for so many Saturdays, what happened?” and all that. I answered it all and it was my turn for questions, and the first one was, how are you all? How is Suma, PV and all doing?

The answer I heard shook me off. Suma was an engineering graduate, had just finished her course and was working with the Mutt, doing all the computer work that was needed. She was a sweet kid. Very active, motivated by the words of a great saint and had read a lot. I liked and admired her spirit and wanted her to have a bright future and a good life.

She is the only kid of her parents, who had let her pursue spiritual path, work for a spiritual place, when a lot of others would stop their kids from doing so. I also heard that, her mom had fallen ill after this news. Her dad is asking her to come back, not marry if she does not want to, but stay with them, doing what she likes to do.

She took the leap, jumped off the cliff; she jumped off, without getting tied to any rope. It is her life, and she did what she wanted to. I know I am no one to judge, but I still am. Aren’t I? When I think, whether what she did was the right thing or not? And it bothers me much more, because there were situations where even I wanted to jump, but I did not. I held on to the ropes. This one incident is making me think about every other decision I have made in my life.

A good friend of mine told me, “you can live your dreams, but not at the cost of others”. I agreed, but did I do so, as that is what I wanted to hear, or do I really mean to agree? Another friend said it’s a tradeoff we all do. Another in similar lines stating, he has seen many such ‘taking the leap’ people.

I also wonder, was she ready for such a jump? She is a small kid, I mean; 22 – 23 is not an age where you can call someone experienced in life right? She had just opened her eyes; she is just a baby. She forsook it all, not knowing what she is forsaking and jumped off to becoming something she does not know.

I am not God, I know, so I cannot judge what is right or not. But being the human that I am, I will be puzzled for some more time, days at least wondering about everything.

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

ಬೇಲಿ, ದಣಪೆ ಮತ್ತು ಭಗವಂತ

from here http://ittigecement.blogspot.in/2014/04/blog-post.html

to here http://dinakarmoger.blogspot.in/2014/04/blog-post_14.html#comment-form

and then,

ಅವನ ಮನೆ ಸೇರುವಷ್ಟರಲ್ಲಿ ನಾನು ಬೆವತು ಹಣ್ಣು. ಅಲ್ಲಿ ಏನೇನು ಆಗಬಹುದು ಊಹಿಸಿಯ ಮನಸ್ಸುಹಕ್ಕಿ ಹಾಗೆ ಹಾರಡಿತ್ತು. ನನ್ನ ನಾಚಿಕೆ, ಅವನ ಹೊಗಳಿಕೆ, ಅಯ್ಯಯ್ಯೊ... ಅಬ್ಬಬ್ಬಾ...

ನನಗಾಗಿಯೇ ಕಾದಿದ್ದ ಅವನು...

ಮೊದಲು ಟೀ ನಂತರ ಫೈಲ್ ಕೆಲಸ ಎಂದ...

ಹಾರುತ್ತಿದ್ದ ನನ್ನ ಎದೆಯನ್ನು ಹಿಡಿದು ಅಡಿಗೆ ಮನೆಗೆ ನಡೆದೆ...

ಗ್ಯಾಸ್ ಹಚ್ಚಲು ಲೈಟರ್ ತೆಗೆದೆ...

ಗ್ಯಾಸ್ ಆನ್ ಮಾದಿದೆ... ಅಷ್ಟರಲ್ಲಿ ಅವನು ಅಡುಗೆ ಮನೆ ಬಾಗಿಲಿಗೆ ಬಂದ...

ಅವನ ತುಂಟ ನಗು ನೋಡುತ್ತಾ ನಿಂತೆ ನಾನು... ಮಾತಿಗೆಳೆದ ಅವನು...

ಗ್ಯಾಸ್, ಸದ್ದೇ ಇಲ್ಲದೆ, ವಾಸನೆಯೂ ಇಲ್ಲದೆ ಅಡುಗೆ ಮನೆಯ ಗಾಳಿಯನ್ನು ಆವರಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳುತ್ತಿತ್ತು... ಅದರ ಅರಿವು ಇಬ್ಬರಿಗೂ ಇರಲಿಲ್ಲ

ಫೋನ್ ರಿಂಗ್ ಆದದ್ದು ಕೇಳಿ, ಅವ, ಟೀ ಮಾಡು, ಅಲ್ಲೇ ಬಾ, ಮಾತಾಡೋಣ ಎಂದು ಹೇಳಿ ಹಾಲ್ ಗೆ ನಡೆದ...

ಫೋನ್ ನಲ್ಲಿ ಅವನು ಹಾಯ್ ಎಂದು ನನ್ನ ಪತಿಯ ಹೆಸರು ಹೇಳಿದಾಗ ಕನಸಿನ ಲೋಕದಲ್ಲಿದ್ದ ನಾನು ವಾಸ್ತವಕ್ಕೆ ಬಂದಿದ್ದೆ...

BhaShe

Schizophrenia

May be, he loves me
Though I don’t see it
I’d rather believe it

I know am on high guards
I know am in a strong shell
But you can’t stop me from dreaming

Why should I believe you?
For that matter any one?
My ears hear different music

May be, he does not even exist
But, that is true in your reality
Mine has nothing to do with yours

BhaShe

Kitchens – The not-usually-seen ones

I have made it very clear how much I hate cooking. If it was not, now you know! But the irony is I love eating. If you have seen me, you have seen how evident it is. If you have not, then, blame your luck! This background information is furnished just to tell you that I visited some kitchens that are not seen by us on a daily basis.

I know somebody at Domino’s and I have been asking this person to show me the kitchen (I have become such a frequent visitor to Domino’s that I know 2 – 3 people there). He kept denying saying that its evening, the kitchen might be messy and so on. One fine afternoon, I was there and then suddenly it occurred to me that its afternoon and the day has just started and the kitchen would be ready for a visit. And, yes, I was given a kitchen tour.

The cold storage, I liked it there, I think it was 0 or -4 degree temperature and it was nice. All veg and non-veg stuff stored separately, their packaging, how materials come there and how they turn into a pizza and all that. Then I saw the preparation area, where the pizza gets prepared.

You have heard the order takers scream “refresh” once the order is placed right? That is for the screen near the preparation area where they get to see the order and make it. They have the cut veggies stored there, the toppings n all that we eat.

Then the oven, where a pizza is done in 6 minutes, yes. The raw one is put on the conveyor which carries it inside the oven, keeps it moving n after 6 minutes when it comes out, it will be ready to eat. Nice right?

Then the packaging area, where the order number is stuck to a shelf and the pizzas get cut, packed and gets ready to deliver. It’s all a very beautiful process.

It’s a very small kitchen compared to what I saw in a KFC.

After this visit to Domino’s I was curious about the other most important junk food I eat, burgers. As I have a KFC close to my house, one Saturday evening, I decided to pay a visit n spend some time knowing how they cook.

KFC has a really long kitchen, 4 levels or steps as I recollect. One cold storage and one freezer area, pre-preparation areas, preparation areas, one ready-to-eat-made-ready space and the sales counter.

I had seen the cold storage area but deep freezing, oh my god, it was freezing. The temperature was at -20 degrees and I ran out of the area as soon as I can. They also have a normal storage space where groceries are stored.

KFC gets cut veggies by a vendor, and guess that is how it works at other places too. Though I wished to see something getting done, because of lack of orders at that time, I only got to see the spaces and the equipments used.

The ovens, the deep frying area, the rice making place, the preparation area, it is again a very nice process. They purify the oil (used to deep fry) every day but change it once a week, made me think if I should eat at KFC anymore. Taste won and logic lost.

I have some more kitchens in my head now. Would you want to join me to explore some more kitchens?

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

Transition

Happily married then,
Much happily divorced now

Then, it was all plans for two
Now, it's one, lot plans are now
Then, it was cozy places and corner seats
Now, it is lonely walks and self treats

Then, it was long nights on bed
Now, it is longer nights with good books
Then, it was compromise and adjustments
Now, it is priorities and my own trends

Then, it was shared smiles and bitter words
Now, it is fights with self and connected chords
Then, it was egos, tears, share and care
Now it is "I am the Queen of my World and I don't care"

Was that better or is this the best?
No such question, as it is all part of the quest
It is a transition from married to divorced
In the journey of life, nothing should be devoid.

BhaShe

Songs of the Hunger

Songs of the hunger
Are not made, but are born
Are sung from the stomach, not heart
Are powerful than anything else

Songs of the hunger
Are crude, rude and natural
They reach the heights and the lows
That are otherwise impossible

Songs of the hunger
Are from the earth and the skies
They bring out the best of what is
Colors and shades, smells and fragrances

Songs of the hunger
Come along with blood and tears
They are the true self of pain and pleasure
They are feelings and emotions ‘songified’

BhaShe

A day Trip to Penukonda

Don’t get Penukonda confused with Penugonda, I did and I was shocked. How am I supposed to reach this place in 3 hours from Mekhri circle, how is a KSRTC or an APSRTC bus gonna travel 800+ kms in 3 hours? Was Ramesh joking? Ramesh is so dead! Hey, hold on, was it Penugonda or Penukonda? He said it’s near Ananthpur, oh, hmm… my bad! Its penukonda and it’s only 140+ kms from Banglalore on the way to Hyderabad. Stupid me.

So, the occasion was my dear sweet neighbor Ramesh’s wedding. I had to go, and I did, today.

Got up at 5:30, (planned was 4:30!), tried those 2 dresses that I thought I would still fit in and I could not breath when I wore them. The third one did fit in and that’s the one for the day. Should I take a shawl? Yes, no, yes no, ok, forget it, am going to a dry area, no need of warm clothes. So, I was ready and was at Mekhri circle early enough.

‘There is a bus once every 10 minutes, take the one that comes through Bagepalli and not Hindupur, you will reach in two and half hours”, I waited and waited and waited, no bus at all. ‘Ramesh, you are so dead’. Well, how long did I wait? I was still home at 6:15 AM, and I might have left by then, would have reached the bus stop only by 6:30 or 6:40 and I got a bus at 7. God! That’s not too long! Bangalore has made me impatient, or was it the lack of music in my ears? Well, whatever, it felt as if I waited for hours to get that bus.

It was an APSRTC luxury bus. Is it still called APSRTC? Guess so. So, I have boarded this bus and it goes through Bagepalli. Nice start! The journey I started long back on the Hyderrabad highway, that was unfinished, was restarted today, but just to reach till Penukonda.

New route, I did not want to sleep, as I wanted to enjoy the beauty of the journey. I felt it was a dry area. It was a cloudy day, and chill at 7. I did doze off for some time. Read Oh Manase on the way, holding a Kannada magazine in an APSRTC bus where everyone else was reading Telgu granted me some gazes.

Ramesh told, ‘I am going to handover my phone to Anil, so, as soon as you get down at the bus stop, call me, I will get someone sent to the bus stop to get you picked’. So, I thought I would inform him am coming, so, I called, and called and called, no one picked up. Next option was to call Mani. I did and a lady picked up and said, ‘sorry wrong number’! Holy! What am I gonna do now? I do not have an invitation as he ran out of them when he invited me, a sms is what I have and it just says alight at penukonda stop! No! Ramesh, you are so dead! Ah! I remember the wedding is at vasavi kalyana mantap. I think I should be able to reach there!

Help came in the form of my build owner, as I called her, she gave me Mani’s other number and told that the venue is close to bus stop and any auto guy would take me there without much of trouble. Now I was sure that I will get there.

When my friends put up picture of their speeding car at 160 or 180 and mention that it was on the Hyderabad highway, I wondered, but now I know how and why they do that. Road is amazing, also it’s very boring, as its very dry, or is it because it’s almost summer and it’s dried up? Well, in any case, for the ones like me who are from the typical rainy regions of Karnataka, the Western Ghats, everything else is dry.

When I googled Penukonda, I knew there is a fort, but did not search enough to find more about it. I regret that now. As I got there, I saw boards indicating ‘way to the fort’. When I asked Anil if it is a place to visit, he laughed at me. I hope he was right, but if you tell me now that he was wrong, am gonna feel bad and am gonna make another trip.

Also, I wish I was there with my dad. Where ever we go, me and dad, we ensure to roam around the city to whatever extent we can and visit places there. I missed you Dad.

I reached the venue; the wedding was done in due time, met them and wished them, done. Lunch was done by 1:15, met the bride and groom again, said bye and left the place at 1:30.

I reach the APSRCT bus stop. I asked to get dropped there because I thought that is “The Bus Stop” and all buses would come there. Well, I do not know Telgu, I hope you all know that. So, am at the bus stop, I go the enquiry section and ask the person there ‘when is the next bus to Bangalore’, he says, at 2:15 or 2:30. Holy! Why, again! Ramesh had told there is a bus every 10 minutes, he is so dead. I ask again, what about KSRTC buses, the APSRTC person makes a face and says I have no details on their timings.

I was disappointed and went and sat, but hey, why are those people waiting outside the bus stop, oh, there comes a bus, let me see where that goes, it’s a KSRTC bus and yeah, it goes to Bangalore. As I sat down, I understood, the KSRTC buses won’t come inside an APSRTC bus stop and if I had waited inside, I would have been a real fool. Thank god!

Again, Hyderabad highway, because I had dozed off coming here, I decided again to stay awake. Oh Manase and music for my company. I saw Mango orchards but trees without any sign of any fruits. Also, there were many Vineyards, and the agriculturist in me got inquisitive. I wish I get to go to a vineyard, understand the cultivation process, eat some grapes there and come. I really want to do that, but how? Whom to contact? Many questions! Hopefully I will figure that out soon.

I did doze off on the way back too and I think I did not miss much. Was back at Mekhri at 4:30 PM! A short, nice, memorable trip to Penukonda was over like this!

BhaShe

The Memory Test

This is a story of my life that I got reminded of recently, I don’t know why. I believe that I am still the way I was when this incident happened. Before this story gets lost in my brain again, I am writing it down.

I was in either 6th or 7th standard. We used to have hobli, taluk and district level competitions for singing, group dance, general knowledge, quiz, don’t know what not and for memory. You would have already guessed what a memory test is. Some 50 odd items are kept in a classroom and all the participants are asked to have a look at these items for about 5 or 10 minutes and write them down in the next 10 or 15 minutes. Yeah! That’s the game I am talking about.

I had won the hobli level competition and had progressed to the next level that is taluk level. These competitions were normally held at different schools every year. I think that year it was held at Kottigehara or jawali or some other place. Me, other winners from my school and our teacher went to the competition.

Other competitions were in progress and we were sitting/standing in the school premises waiting for our completions to start. As I had nothing to prepare for, some causal talks were also going on. I don’t remember exactly how and why it happened, I think we went in search of a place to sit, and happened to notice an open window of a classroom which had the items set for the memory test.

If you participate/win in a district level competition, there is some certification and recognition. To get there, one has to win the taluk level competition. This is also an honor to the school.

My teacher told me to have a detailed look at the items, write them down and memorize them, so that I win the competition. Along with a friend of mine, I went near the window to have a clear view of all the items listed there.

I looked at those items for a couple of minutes and I came back. I told my teacher that I do not want to participate in the competition. She asked my friend who had accompanied me to participate. He agreed. He went and listed all the items down and participated and won the competition there. The school had incurred my travel expenses which went for a waste because I did not participate.

I could not compete because I knew from inside that it was not right. I don’t remember what reasons I gave to my teacher but I definitely did not tell her my inner feeling. I was in 6th or 7th standard then. Am sure most of us agree winning a competition is always an achievement. I did not participate.

I think am still the same.

Sowmyashree Gonibeedu

Draupadi - The fear!

Don’t make any judgments based on the title here! All I intend to do, by giving this title is to showcase the fear of getting naked in public. Have you ever felt the fear of a major wardrobe malfunction in public? A wardrobe malfunction which will leave you with only basic garments on your body and which will leave you damaged for the rest of your life. I have something to share.

This was 2 or 3 years ago. Then, I used to stare at the sarees I have and feel bad for not wearing them at all. The ones which I cannot wear to any function, because they are not grand enough, were lying in my cupboard unused. One day I told myself, well, I’ll wear these sarees to work whenever I feel like.

The first day I did that, the response was overwhelming (well, all the complements from my colleagues made me feel so good that saree has become my medicine for depression). That day I decided to wear sarees often. That evening when I was on my way home, it started raining. It’s a 15 minutes’ walk from the bus stop to my house and as I carry an umbrella all the time, I started walking in the rain.

If you know and understand how a saree is worn, you know that the beginning of a saree is stuck into the petticoat. Imagine the beginning of the saree coming out. It’s an inner layer, so, you won’t be able to tuck it back in without taking off your saree or lifting it to a length that will not be decent. You will not even have easy access to get to the beginning, and also, as it comes out, there is a high chances that you might trip on it and fall down. Set of troubles!

As I was walking towards my home, I saw that my saree was coming down, and I realized that the beginning of my saree has come out from the clutches of my petticoat and I was stumbling on it. Just one more time it goes beneath my feet and I take a long step, my saree will be on the road!!! OMG!!! It’s a rainy evening, muddy road and a lot of people have taken shelters in the nearby shops waiting for the rain to stop, staring at the road. I was about to face a life scarring wardrobe malfunction.

Thankfully I got to know what is happening and what would happen if I continue. I halted, held the rest of the saree tight and started walking like a tortoise. I did reach home with my dignity held up high! Thank god for no malfunction on the road.

After this incident, I learnt a trick from my aunt. Put a knot to the beginning of the saree and tuck it inside the petticoat. This won’t let the saree to come out from that end easily! I do that and it’s a success, or that’s what I thought till recently.

This one is a very recent incident.

After finishing work, I was running towards the bus stop as it was already 9:30 in the evening. I was wearing a saree again this day. As it was cold, I had covered myself with a shawl. As it was late, I was walking very fast. Just when I was around the corner, I felt that my saree is coming down again, from the same end! What the hell! I had put the knot!

I rushed into a hotel nearby, and found a very small loo there. Thank god! I took the shawl off to see what is wrong! Sigh! Relief, it’s just my pallu which has come down from the wrong end! There is nothing wrong with the saree, it’s all fine, and I was just paranoid. I put the shawl back and ran to the bus stop.

You think I have stopped wearing saree now? Naa… these things can’t kill my spirit (or can’t kill my hunger for some complements once a while). ;) But I did feel the fear, I guess I know how Draupadi would have felt when she was dragged into the “sabhangana”.

BhaShe